


Justice For Spike

by Ajmilone



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:26:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25133860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ajmilone/pseuds/Ajmilone
Summary: Buffy finally starts to relax around Spike when an unexpected guest arrives.Set in S6 after Older and Far Away
Relationships: Spike/Buffy Summers
Comments: 15
Kudos: 71





	1. The Unexpected Visitor

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> beta’d by kats_meow. I owe her so much love and gratitude for listening to me whine about this fic for so long

Buffy was absolutely exhausted after another shift at the Doublemeat, which seemed specifically designed to relieve her of her will to live. Not that she was emotionally stable to begin with. Between being dragged out of a heavenly dimension, her friends distancing themselves from her, her sister's teenage antics, working fast food, and sleeping with a soulless vampire, Buffy was just exhausted. 

The house was silent as Buffy trekked from the bathroom to her bedroom, running her fingers through her freshly-washed hair. She could have been imagining it, but she swore she could still smell the grease from the grill at work. 

She couldn't even summon the energy to think about the smell. She collapsed into bed, bathrobe and all. She closed her eyes, feeling so empty and alone. Buffy was just about to let the darkness take over her mind and drift into the blissful oblivion of sleep when she heard a sharp tapping on her window. Opening one eye, she glanced over and groaned. 

Without waiting for an invitation, Spike pushed the window open and let himself in. "Hey, pet," he said quietly.

"No, Spike." Buffy's sharp tone had a severe note of finality to it.

"No? You haven't even heard the question yet."

Buffy rolled her eyes. "I know what you're thinking."

"You know what I'm thinking because we're both thinking it." Spike curled his tongue behind his teeth suggestively. When Buffy closed her eyes and turned away, Spike's look became more speculative and worried. He tilted his head and his tone became more concerned. "I, uh, saw the witch and the nibblet headed out for the night, thought you might like some company."

Buffy looked back at him. "I'm not really up for acrobatics tonight, Spike. I'm just so tired,” she finished with an exhausted whisper.

Spike took a tentative step forward. "We don't have to do anything, Buffy," he said imploringly. "I can be here for you, if you'll let me. Like before."

Buffy considered. She didn't want to let the darkness consume her, not really. When Spike was around, she almost felt like herself. Almost.

"Alright, you can stay."

Spike gave her a small smile and started to take off his coat. "Right, so where should I...?" He started looking around.

"Here," Buffy whispered. She shifted over in her bed to make room for the vampire. "Could you just hold me?" 

Everything about Spike softened. His muscles relaxed and his face took on a gentle loving gaze that nearly brought Buffy to tears. Sometimes it hit her that Spike really, truly loved her. The more time she spent with him, the more torn she felt. How could someone without a soul be someone she could be in a loving relationship with? It was just impossible. No, it was better for her to be alone.

Except for these stolen moments. She snuggled into the vampire that loved her and drifted off to sleep.

**********

Buffy was woken up with a jolt the next morning. Spike had pushed away from her and jumped out of bed. He was standing next to the bed looking horrified.

"What the hell, Spike?" she groused. Considering how gentle he had been the night before, she hadn't expected such a rough awakening.

"I beg your pardon, Miss, I cannot imagine how I came to be here," Spike said. "I am not one to partake frequently, but I can only imagine that I must have been quite inebriated to impose upon you in this manner."

"Huh?" Buffy narrowed her eyes at him. His accent had changed. He seemed more cultured, somehow, sounded more like Giles than the Spike she knew and...knew. And what was going on with his hair and clothes? He was wearing a ridiculous beige suit of some sort. And his hair was light brown and longer than she had ever seen it. How had he changed so much overnight? "What are you talking about? Why are you being weird? Or...weirder?"

Spike furrowed his brow in a show of confusion. "I must admit that I have no recollection of our interaction, to my regret, but if you will name your fee, I can pay you and be on my way."

Buffy bristled. "You think I'm a prostitute?! You go all transform-y overnight and automatically assume I’m a prostitute?!” Spike shuffled uncomfortably. "Oh my god, this is just..." Buffy shook herself. This wasn't Spike. Spike did not talk like this and Spike was never uncomfortable around her. She jumped up, unmindful of the bathrobe that she wore to bed and that she was showing more than was strictly proper, and glared at the thing that looked like Spike. "What the hell are you? What have you done with Spike?"

Not Spike sputtered nervously. "I assure you, I do not know who this Spike character is. One moment, I am working in my home library, and the next...well, I was here." He shook his head as if to clear it. "As you seem just as befuddled as I, allow me to introduce myself so that we may properly proceed with solving this mystery. My name is William."

Buffy just stared at him. "William," she repeated, deadpan. 

"Yes. And you are?"

Buffy was unsure of how to proceed. Did something happen for Spike to sustain some kind of brain damage? She was pretty sure he hadn't gone by the name "William" since he was human. Unless something happened to make him think he was human again. But that didn’t explain the make-over.

Mind spinning, Buffy decided to give him a quick test. "Uh, William...what year is it?"

William looked at her as if she was the one who lost her mind. "1877, of course," he answered, puzzled. "I'm sorry, Miss, I would feel better if I knew your name."

"Buffy," she answered cautiously. William opened and closed his mouth several times as if to comment on her name before thinking better of it. "Oh, save it," she growled.

"I beg your pardon, Miss Buffy, but save what?"

Buffy rolled her eyes. She was already missing sarcastic Spike. She did not have the patience to deal with a Victorian gentleman right now. 

By this point, William had had a moment to look at his surroundings. His breathing quickened as his eyes started to dart around in panic. “Good lord,” he gasped, “what is...where am...oh my!” He started to hyperventilate, taking a handkerchief from his pocket and dabbing at his sweaty brow.

“Oh no, no panic attack allowed!” Buffy rushed forward and took his hand in an attempt to calm him. “William, listen to me! You’re in the future.”

William frantically shook his head, trying to catch his breath. “This must be a dream. I shall wake and all this will turn out to be a simple night terror.”

Sympathy washed over Buffy. She bent her knees slightly so she could catch his eye. “William, do I look real to you?” She squeezed his hand. “Do I feel real?”

Shakily, William nodded.

Buffy smiled encouragingly. “Good, that’s good. Deep breath in! Ok, something ooky is going on here. For some reason, you’ve been propelled into the future. Breathe out, William, it’s ok, calm down. We are going to find out what happened and fix it. Together. Ok?”

William gave her a small, wary smile as he took deep breaths along with her soothing voice. His gaze was cautiously trusting when he finally spoke again. “You shan’t forsake me? Miss Buffy, you’ll stay with me through this horror?”

“I won’t leave you. I’m here,” Buffy promised firmly. She heard William’s breaths slow back to normal as he gradually calmed down.

"Buffy? Are you alright?" a voice said through the wall.

Buffy turned wide, panicked eyes on William. "Oh no," she whispered. 

William looked confused. "Miss Buffy? Who is - " 

The rest of his question was cut off by the bedroom door banging open. The room soon felt like all of the air was sucked out of it by Hurricane Dawn. 

Dawn's eyes went wide with shock as she noticed a Spike-look-alike in Buffy's bedroom. "Oh my god!" she squealed. "Are you two finally together? Aww, I love you guys!"

Buffy shook her head in denial while William turned a very interesting shade of red. His blush just confirmed that there was no way he was Spike. "No, Dawnie, we aren't. This isn't Spike."

Dawn gave her a skeptical look. "Ok, I'll play your game." Turning to William, she adopted a sarcastic tone. "Who are you and what are you doing in my sister's bedroom?"

William's face turned, if possible, even redder. He gave a slight bow to Dawn before introducing himself. "William, at your service, Miss. And you are?"

Dawn's jaw dropped unattractively. She wheeled around to look at Buffy.

Buffy could just shrug at her helplessly. "I know. He's been like this all morning."

That seemed to snap Dawn out of her stupor. "And what was he doing here this morning? Did he sleep here?"

"William, this is Dawn," Buffy said hastily. Dawn narrowed her eyes at her sister but didn't otherwise pry.

"A pleasure," William gave one of his slight bows once more. "Now, may I enquire as to your facilities?"

Buffy's face took on a blank stare. Luckily, Dawn understood Old Timey talk. "Bathroom's right over here, William. I'll show you."

As William allowed himself to be led away, Buffy pondered what just happened. If he needed to use the bathroom, he wasn't a vampire anymore. Was it possible that a human William had replaced vampire Spike? Something fishy was going on and it was making Buffy nervous. Despite herself, she was beginning to get worried about Spike. 

There was a clinking sound coming from downstairs in the kitchen. Buffy determinedly started to make her way towards it. Maybe Willow had read about something similar. It was as good a place to start as any. 

Buffy paused briefly in the living room before entering the kitchen. Before she could change her mind, she grabbed the phone and called Tara. Tara had become her port in the storm, the one person who knew about her relationship with Spike and didn't judge her for it. Leaving a message on Tara's machine summarizing the previous night and this morning's events, Buffy let out a sigh. Just letting Tara know what was going on was already such a comfort to her. Tara would understand that Spike was important to Buffy and try to find a solution. Squaring her shoulders, Buffy finally felt ready to enter the kitchen and talk to Willow. 

"Hey, Wills," she said as she entered.

"Morning, Buffy." Willow eyed her over her coffee cup. "You alright?"

Buffy gave a low chuckle. "You won't believe the morning I'm having."

She was saved from trying to explain by the back door banging open and a smoking figure came running in under a blanket.

"What the bloody hell?" Spike roared. He slammed the door shut and threw the blanket to the side before eyeing Buffy furiously. "Want to tell me why I woke up alone in my crypt this morning? Get your little witchy friend to do a little transportation spell cause you couldn't handle being too close to my undead self?"

"Spike - " Buffy tried to interrupt as Willow looked wide eyed and shocked at the two of them. Spike wasn't about to drop the bone he had to pick with her. He started to pace as he ranted. 

"You know, I think I have you figured out, Slayer. You need me. You need me, so you let your guard down and bring me close. But once you realize I'm exactly what you need, you push me away. Can't bear to be happy, can you? But I'm not your exes, I'm not about to ditch - " Spike was cut off when he caught sight of the figure in the kitchen doorway.

Buffy looked behind her and sighed. "Spike, may I introduce you to William?"

Spike and William exclaimed in unison, creating an odd echo effect. "Bloody hell."


	2. Brave New World

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I owe everything to kats_meow for being the best beta ever

There was a brief pause as Spike and his doppleganger stared at each other in complete shock. 

“Oh my!” William exclaimed. “It is as if I am looking through a very strange looking glass!” Tearing his eyes away from Spike, William caught sight of the rest of the kitchen. “Good lord! Miss Buffy, I know you told me this is the future, but this is quite shocking!”

Buffy held out a placating hand. “I’m sure this is different from what you’re used to, William. Take deep breaths, remember? This is Spike. He looks like you because he is you at this time. Explaining why you exist this far in the future will take a while, but I promise I’ll explain later.” William took a few deep breaths before nodding and smiling at Buffy.

After a moment, Spike's lip curled and he turned to glare at Willow.

"What the bloody hell kind of game are you trying to play, Red?"

Willow looked flummoxed. "I don't think I understand what's going on here."

Buffy sighed. "I woke up this morning to having a house full of Watered-Down Spike. I don't know how he got here, but he seems human."

Spike snorted. "Of course, he's human. I can hear the poor sod's heart from here."

"If I may interject," William started, "I would like to assist in any way possible. This situation has me quite distressed." He then grasped the lapels of his jacket and drew himself up. “And I am not a ‘watered-down’ version of anyone. I am my own person, regardless of my resemblance to this Spike, and I can hear you when you talk about me!” William slumped down again, slightly dejected, and turned his hurt gaze to Buffy. “I had thought that you, Miss Buffy, understood that.”

Everyone stared at him in shock. Willow was the one to break the silence. "I'll research at the Magic Box later today, see what I can find out. Just after apartment hunting." Buffy raised her eyebrow, prompting Willow to explain. "I'm trying to find a place closer to Spellcasters Anonymous. That way, I have no excuse not to go." And, with a nervous smile at William, she left.

Buffy smiled tentatively at William. “I’m sorry, William. My brain is all over the place. I didn’t mean to make you feel bad or take away from your identity.”

William’s eyes shone with renewed trust. “That’s quite alright, Miss Buffy. I accept your apology.”

A tense silence fell on the kitchen as Buffy, Spike, and William considered how to proceed.

Dawn chose that moment to enter the kitchen from her unseen spot behind William. She took stock of the awkwardness between Spike, William, and Buffy before deciding to take charge. 

"Good morning, everyone! Buffy, what's for breakfast? William, you must be starving."

Buffy jumped as if startled. "Um, I think there's cereal."

Dawn rolled her eyes. "Gourmet meal at the Summers’ residence." She turned to smile at William, who was twiddling his fingers nervously, obviously feeling out of place. "Here, William, you can sit at the island and I'll get you a bowl of cereal."

"Thank you kindly, Miss Dawn." William smiled at her, causing Spike to growl ominously.

"Don't you get too familiar with my Bit," he rumbled protectively. 

Buffy turned away from the fridge where she was getting the milk and placed a comforting hand on Spike's arm. "Relax. From what I can tell, he is just a human version of you. Dawn already showed him the bathroom, he could have hurt her then, if he wanted. What we need to figure out is how to get him back to 1877," she said reasonably. "And what to do with him ‘til then."

"I say!" William sputtered. "What to do with me?!"

Spike settled in and leaned against the island. "Calm down, lil Willy, I won't let anything happen to you. For all I know, if something happens to you, it will affect my life now. Not too keen on that, I'll admit." He turned to Buffy to look her in the eyes. "I'm not convinced he isn't here as some tool to get at you, Slayer. I'll stick by him to protect you both."

Dawn cut in. "Well, we can't just kick him out. He arrived here, so he's our responsibility. He should stay with us."

Conversation was halted by William's delighted gasp after trying a bite of cereal. "This is appalling! And yet, I cannot prevent myself from eating more!" Looking around, he ducked his head shyly once he noticed everyone was staring at him. "I mean to say, Miss Dawn has an excellent point. I do not know anyone else in this time, so I shall like to stay at this residence. If you will have me." He glanced up and smiled bashfully at Buffy.

Buffy shrugged. "I don't see where else you could go, so I guess we could make up the couch until we figure this out."

Spike leered at Buffy, curling his tongue behind his teeth. "Seeing as I have no intention of leaving my human self, I suppose you're stuck with me, too."

Buffy glared at Spike threateningly. "How do you figure?"

"If William is staying here, so am I." He winked at her. "I can be a very pleasant houseguest."

"Oh my god!" Dawn squealed. "Slumber party! It would be totally cool for Spike to stay here."

"Ta, Nibblet." Spike grinned.

Buffy conceded defeat. "Fine. Dawn, before you head to school, you and William make up the couch. I'll set up the cot in the basement for Spike." 

While Dawn skipped off to find sheets with William setting a proper pace behind her, Buffy and Spike went down into the basement. Spotting the cot over in the corner, she pulled it against the far wall and began to unfold it.

"This would be a rather cozy fit for two, don't you think, love?" Spike's husky voice broke her concentration.

"And what makes you think there will be two people on this cot?" she retorted.

Spike threw his head back in exasperation. "Oh, come off it, Buffy! Last night you needed some comfort from the cellar dweller. And it was beautiful." Buffy's eyes widened as his voice dropped to a whisper. "All I did was hold you and watch you sleep. We were so close and everything felt right.” He straightened his shoulders and moved to glare challengingly into her eyes. "And you cannot hide from that."

"No," she admitted. "I can't. I don't want to." 

Spike's eyes narrowed as he tilted his head to consider her intently. "Were you there with me?"

It was Buffy's turn for her voice to drop to a whisper. "I was."

Spike's eyes shone with love, devotion, and hope. "What does that mean?"

Buffy took a moment to think about it so that she could answer honestly. She had to admit that something had clicked into place last night, in Spike's arms. But she didn't want to open herself up just yet. She spent so much time and energy pushing Spike away emotionally that the idea of admitting that she had enjoyed letting him in exhausted her. She wasn’t quite ready to allow herself to be vulnerable, although she had to admit that the moment she would be ready was fast approaching. And now they had Spike’s human counterpart running around to possibly complicate things. She had a feeling that having William in her home was going to give her more insight into Spike's personality and she really wanted to explore. 

So she decided to answer him with a touch of honesty combined with some deflection. "I don't know, Spike. You're right, there's something there." His eyes lit up so brightly that Buffy could feel a slight panic in her chest, almost like an inflating balloon. She hurried on to the deflection part before she let out too much emotion. "But we should really focus on getting William back to his time. Who knows, maybe he will change my mind about you, one way or the other."

Spike's shoulders slumped. "Yeah, maybe. I'm not him anymore, pet. He's wet. Don't judge me based on him."

"Oh, I don't know," Buffy said lightly, "maybe there's more William in you than you know." She gave him an encouraging smile almost despite herself. "Go ahead and throw those sheets in the wash. You can spend the daylight hours down here."

Buffy went up the stairs and into the kitchen. William was in the kitchen with his entire head inside the microwave.

"Extraordinary," she heard him murmur. She giggled, startling him so that he jumped and banged his head. 

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," she giggled. "I'm guessing you've never seen a microwave before?"

William's eyes shone with scholarly joy at learning a new word. "A microwave? No, I cannot say that I have ever seen such a contraption. Would you be so kind as to demonstrate its function?"

Buffy smiled kindly at him. It must have been so scary to be thrust over a century into the future, but other than slight nervous ticks, such as his constant fidgeting with his fingers, William was hiding his discomfort remarkably well. "A microwave heats up food. I'll be sure to make you a burrito at some point."

"A burrito, Miss?" Between seeing his brow furrowed in confusion and hearing his proper accent say "burrito,” Buffy was overtaken with giggles again. When was the last time she had giggled? Certainly before her resurrection. She found herself feeling grateful to and fond of William for making her forget her emptiness, even if only for a moment. She opened her mouth to explain a burrito to William when she was interrupted by a soft voice.

"Buffy?" Tara entered the kitchen and looked quizzically at William. "Kind of sunny in here for Spike, isn't it?"

Before Buffy could say anything, William shyly stepped forward. 

"Pleasure to make your acquaintance, Miss. I am William." He gave a small bow of courtesy in greeting.

Tara confusedly met the giggling Slayer's eyes. "Um, I'm Tara," she said awkwardly. She turned to Buffy and said shrewdly, "I'm guessing this is why you called?"

"Yes." Buffy nodded firmly. "I think we better all sit down so I can tell you what happened. And it's probably best if you're here to help explain the supernatural aspects to William. With my rambling, I don't want to scare him."

Tara eyed William kindly. "I can see where this would be a lot to take in. William, are you alright if we all sit together for a long talk? It may be pretty scary for you."

William straightened himself up to his full height and pulled at the hem of his jacket. "Indeed. I realize I am not as gruff or outwardly hard as this Spike seems to be, but I have a strong heart. I can comfortably converse regardless of how distasteful the subject matter is. Let me put the kettle on and we may sit." He single mindedly turned toward the stove before pausing and turning back to Buffy. "Er, Miss? Do you have a kettle? And how does one go about heating your range?"

Buffy and Tara shared another smile before moving to help William so that they could sit and have a long talk. It wouldn’t be easy to explain vampires and Slayers to a Victorian gentleman, but Buffy figured she owed him the respect of the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I must admit, I’m seeing the benefits to posting a chapter a week. This is fun! Hope you’re enjoying it, hang in there, gang!


	3. When William Met Buffy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone for reading and reviewing, you’ve been really bolstering me up!
> 
> Special shout out to the beautiful and talented kats_meow for her amazing beta work!

By the time Buffy caught Tara up on William's sudden appearance that morning, it was nearly lunch time. And by the time Tara and Buffy taught William about the basics of vampirism and how Spike was a vampiric version of William, it was late afternoon.

William remained remarkably stoic throughout the conversation. While his eyes showed shock and fear during much of their talk, William sat perfectly still and hid behind taking minute sips of tea and the occasional “Oh my!” during particularly shocking parts of the narrative. Buffy couldn't tell how much he believed or how much was really upsetting him, but she knew Spike well enough to read William's body language. His clenched jaw and tense shoulders showed her that he was not as passive as he was trying to play off. Buffy didn't know what to do, but she could sympathize. She knew what it was like to be thrust into a scary and unknown scenario.

Her thoughts inevitably turned toward awakening in her own grave. She could feel herself begin to spiral when William cut in.

"Miss Buffy? Would you like another cup of tea?"

Her eyes jolted up to meet his. Deep within his crystalline depths was concern. She couldn't help but smile to herself. Somehow, in the midst of his own personal drama, William had been able to stop and catch Buffy as she spun into despair. Much like a certain vampire. Maybe there was more William in Spike than he cared to admit.

"No, thanks, William. I'm good," she assured him. He smiled at her with an almost awkward affection before averting his eyes with many "Yes, well"s. 

Tara jumped up rather suddenly. "Oh! I didn't even realize how late it's getting. I have class to get to! I better get going. I’ll try and do some research after class." She grabbed her bag and started to head out.

Buffy was content saying goodbye and thank you from where she was sitting in the kitchen until she realized that William was seeing Tara to the door. Huh, William was pretty chivalrous, especially considering this wasn't even his house. Not to be outdone by a stuffy Victorian, Buffy hastened to join him in seeing Tara out.

Once the door was closed, William turned to Buffy. "Today has been quite an adventure," he began. "I must say, it works up quite the appetite."

"Um, right, food," Buffy rambled, mind racing. "I, uh, don't really have much food here. No one is ever really around much, even Dawn spends a lot of time with her friends." She trailed off as she realized William was watching her steadily. "You know what? We can just go to my work. Free food. Problem solved."

"Splendid," William smiled. Buffy felt her heart sink as she led him out. She hoped he wasn't expecting a gourmet meal.

**********

"Oh, I say!" William exclaimed as they entered the Doublemeat Palace. Buffy had to admit that the bright fluorescent lights and neon paint job must be shocking to a Victorian gentleman. Heck, they were shocking to her and she worked here.

"I know it's a lot, but it's free food since this is my job. Only perk, really. So go ahead and sit anywhere, and I'll bring us something to eat."

She watched William try to decide which sticky table to sit at with growing affection. She had to admit to herself that his bumbling awkwardness was really cute. And it just made it more amusing to her that he had Spike's face. The two aspects of sweet William and sarcastic Spike made an interesting mesh in her mind and she was having fun trying to figure out how the two fit together.

Bringing the food over, she saw William's eyes widen. "I know this is probably different than what you're used to, but dig in!" she said, pushing a Doublemeat Medley his way.

William gamely took a bite of his burger before struggling not to choke on it. After managing to swallow it, he was polite enough to try and assure Buffy that it was "quite delicious" and that he was always grateful to try "exotic foods" at every opportunity.

Buffy grimaced. "I know it's not the tastiest cuisine, but sometimes it's all I can afford."

William softened. "Oh, Miss Buffy, I did not mean to suggest...this is a fantastic meal. I have never had anything like it before and am in your debt for providing something so filling."

Buffy smiled reassuringly. "It's ok, William. I actually get kind of sick of it. But it keeps my tummy full!" She put on a cheerful voice so that he wouldn't worry and took a monster bite out of her burger. "Anyway," she said around her mouthful, "I have been bombarding you with stressful stuff all day. Why don't you tell me about yourself?" She really was interested, especially if there was any information that she could blackmail Spike with later.

"Oh, well, I'm afraid I'm not very interesting." William blushed. "It's really just Mother and me at home."

Buffy choked on her bite. Swallowing it down hastily, she gasped, "You live with your mother?"

"Of course." William smiled fondly. "She is the kindest woman I know. Every day I wonder how she suffers my company," he chuckled self deprecatingly. "She really is quite an extraordinary creature. Not unlike yourself. Everyone in our society knows that should they have a need, they must only call on Miss Anne."

"Anne?" Buffy stared at him in shock. "That's my middle name! I actually went by 'Anne' a couple years ago."

William tilted his chin down to look up at her mock sternly. "I do not believe in coincidences, Miss Buffy. Names have power. You and my mother are both strong and beautiful women."

Buffy was pulled up short as his words washed over her. She smiled at him, unable to resist the urge to tease him a little. "You think I'm beautiful?"

William blushed and seemed to lose some of his nerve, beginning to fidget with the Doublemeat wrappings in front of him. "Well, I...that is to say..." Seeming to decide something within him, he clenched his jaw, straightened up, and looked her right in the eye. His sudden determinedness was staggering and sobering to Buffy. "Absolutely, I think you're beautiful, if you don't mind me being so forward. And, as a poet, I know a thing or two about beauty."

It was Buffy's turn to blush. She wasn't expecting him to be so honest. His determination to make her see her worth reminded her forcefully of Spike. He was always trying to make her see herself in ways that contradicted how broken she had been feeling since her resurrection. It made her feel unexpectedly safe to be vulnerable and gave her a desire to open up a bit.

"Thanks. And I was just teasing you before. I know we technically just met, but I feel like I can talk to you as a friend. Most of my friends have moved on or have other things to do." Buffy shook herself. "Not that I blame them. I've been pretty busy myself lately."

William eyed her shrewdly. "With Spike. The way you two interact leads me to believe that there may be more there than you may care to admit."

Buffy forced a smile on her face and affected a cheerful air in an attempt to change the subject. "Ok, Mr. Perceptive! Don't think I didn't notice you saying you're a poet."

William grinned at her, but otherwise let the Spike matter go. He shrugged off her questioning look about his poetry. "It's just scribblings," he mumbled. He looked at her curiously. "Do you enjoy poetry?"

Buffy felt something light up within her. "I never used to. I had a boyfriend once give me a book of poems for my birthday and I just didn't know what to do with it. But I was taking a poetry class in college that I really enjoyed. I was so bummed when I had to drop that class, I felt like I got something from it."

William's eyes seemed to sparkle with mirth. "Who was your favorite poet?"

Buffy shrugged. "Would it be too cliche if I said Shakespeare?"

"Not at all."

"It's just," Buffy felt herself warm up to the topic, "we had to memorize a sonnet that spoke to us and recite it to the class. All the other girls picked the same one, something about comparing me to a summer's day?"

William's warm gaze drank in her features almost hungrily. " ‘Thou art far more lovely and more temperate,’" he quoted.

"Right! That one! Anyway, I chose a different one, which just shows that I don't really fit in with the other girls. But I really liked it."

"Do you remember which one it was?"

Buffy wrinkled her nose in concentration. "Ummm…

'My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun; 

Coral is far more red than her lips' red;

If snow be white, why then her breasts are dun; 

If hair be wires, black wires grow on her head.'

That's all I can really remember," Buffy blushed. "The rest is kind of fuzzy. But I always remember up to the part about hair." She giggled.

William's eyes took on a misty quality as he looked upon her with wonder. Softly, he recited:

" ‘I have seen roses demask'd, red and white, but no such roses see I in her cheeks; 

and in some perfumes is there more delight than in the breath that from my mistress reeks. 

I love to hear her speak, yet well I know that music hath a far more pleasing sound; 

I grant I never saw a goddess go;

My mistress, when she walks, treads on the ground.’"

Here he paused and finished his recitation in a whisper. Entranced, Buffy couldn't help but whisper along so that they recited in unison.

" ‘And yet, by heaven, I think my love as rare as any she belied with false compare.’"

"Wow," Buffy breathed, "That's really something else in a British accent."

William chuckled. "Not the romantic poem I would have expected a young lady to memorize."

"I guess," Buffy allowed. "But it goes back to what Tara and I were telling you about vampires and me being the Slayer. The woman in the poem was ugly and stinky, but she still found love. I try to believe that, even though, as the Slayer, I'm a bit of an outsider, I could find someone who loves me for me. It's, I don't know, comforting."

William tilted his head in a gesture Buffy had always attributed to Spike as he studied her. "Don't give up that dream, Miss Buffy. I shall be very shocked indeed if you do not meet your forever mate, someday. It may be that he is already a part of your life."

"Ugh, are you trying to be all insightful about Spike, again?"

William had the grace to look chagrined. "He did have a particular way of looking at you. If I may be so bold, I can certainly understand the attraction." At this, William seemed to feel that he said too much. He promptly blushed and refused to meet her eyes.

Buffy was utterly touched. He may have been a bit prudish compared to Spike, but she could see similarities between the two of them. They both seemed very eager to express an attraction to her, at the least. But Buffy has seen Spike with his guard down quite a bit since she began sleeping with him. Many of his physical quirks that he hid beneath a Big Bad bravado were here on display in the form of William. All the small things about Spike that secretly charmed her (the way he looked at her, how he always fiddled with his hands, how he couldn't stay still, how passionate he was) were intensified with William, as if he hadn't learned to hide himself yet. She found this side of him endearing.

Taking pity on him, she decided to change the subject. "Hey, wanna know about how I died?"

**********

William seemed to take Buffy's stories rather well. In fact, she thought as they walked home, he had been taking everything much better than could have been expected. He was obviously confused and frightened by his sudden appearance into the future, but he was calmer when they were together. Something about Buffy soothed him. She was pretty shocked by that, considering she felt like she was a complete mess most of the time.

A sudden thought hit her. Here they were, walking home, William chivalrously offering her his arm...this was a date! The more Buffy thought about it, the more giddy she felt. A meal, personal talk, some teasing, walking home arm in arm...this was definitely a date. Something about it made Buffy feel more like the young woman that she really was. Talking with William made her depression take a back seat as she enjoyed the moment.

It was not unlike the time she spent with Spike. Her sexual exploits with Spike made her trauma seem far away, it was why she kept going to him. Would she have a similar experience if she ever talked to him the way she was talking to William? 

As they approached her house, William turned to her. "I am not sure what the proper evening protocol is, here," he said softly. "Normally, I would bid you adieu now that I know you're home safe. But, as I am a guest in your home, I find that I do not know how to conclude the evening."

"Evening?" Buffy sniggered, "It's late afternoon! We haven't even had dinner yet!"

William fidgeted slightly. "It's late enough for it to be improper for me to make assumptions," he mumbled.

"Well," Buffy went for a light, nonchalant tone, "why don't you come in and we can watch a movie? By the time that's done, it will be time for dinner. And I'm sure Spike will be up by then, so we can try and figure out what's going on here."

William looked confused for a moment before he seemed to just trust Buffy and shrug it off. He smiled and gave her a small bow. "Miss Buffy, your servant."

Buffy felt her smile widen and take over her face as she tightened her grip on his arm and led him inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Squeeee!!! A William date at the Doublemeat?! How could I not??
> 
> The poem by Shakespeare is Sonnet 130. It is my absolute fave and the first sonnet I ever had to memorize


	4. Spike vs William

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I had a lot of fun with this chapter! I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> Thanks to kats_meow for being my beta! I love that lady!

Buffy was enjoying a movie with William when Spike emerged from the basement. When Buffy tore her eyes away from the television, she saw Spike watching the way she interacted with William. His expression went from surprised, to sad, to thoughtful, before he realized she was looking at him. Then, he put on the stoic mask that would hide his thoughts from her. Buffy was always in wonder of how much of his emotions would be on full display. He really was an open book most of the time. 

"Good to see you two getting on so well," he snarked. 

William jumped almost guiltily, looking at Spike with a kind of remorse.

"Miss Buffy was just showing me this remarkable invention." He gestured to the television.

"Uh huh," Spike intoned, staring at Buffy intently. She squirmed a little, unsure of why she felt like she and William were caught doing the nasty. "Don't let me keep you from your little fun."

"Actually, you just broke me out of my movie coma. I forgot, I gotta get ready for work." Buffy jumped up and started to leave the living room.

"Work?" William questioned. "Miss Buffy, tell me you are not returning to that ghastly place."

Spike whirled around to point at William with an exultant, "See? I told you. You're too good for that place."

Buffy dropped her eyes so that she wasn't looking at either of them. Why did Spike always have to push her? She wished she could see herself the way that he saw her. "I told you. I need the money," she whispered.

Spike took a step toward her as William looked on curiously. "And I told you, I can get money. Hell, Slayer, I could find you another job if bloody earning it is that important to you. But you work too hard at that hell hole for too little reward. You can do better and I can help."

Buffy thought for a moment about asking him what kind of job he could possibly get her before shaking her head in frustration. Thinking about accepting help from a soulless vampire was giving her a headache. Oh sure, she thought, he's good enough to take care of Dawn or to screw in secret, but I won't accept his help with life stuff. Pushing her thoughts aside, she just said aloud, "I'm late, I really gotta go get ready."

Spike seemed to deflate, shoulders slumping and face falling in resignation. "Alright, pet. Tell you what, though. I'll walk you to your work and continue on to take care of patrol tonight. You're always so bloody tired. You don't have to do everything yourself, you know."

When Buffy just stared at him helplessly, unsure of whether she should accept his help and admit weakness in her exhaustion, he interjected with a soft, "Don't martyr yourself, love. It's ok to accept help sometimes." Quietly, she nodded her head and started up the stairs.

She was halfway up the stairs when she heard William enthusiastically pipe in with, "I would also like to help Miss Buffy. Mind if I tag along on this 'patrol'?"

She couldn't help but smirk when she heard Spike growl out a, "Oh, bloody hell."

Buffy got dressed for work in record time and was watching herself in the mirror while putting up her hair when her skin prickled, sensing a vampire approaching. "No, Spike," she said tonelessly without looking back at him.

"Oh, come on," Spike huffed. He didn't even bother trying to be seductive or subtle. "If I'm gonna spend the evening with Nancy boy down there, I need a little...hmmm...motivation." Leaning in, he nuzzled her neck from behind.

Buffy moved away from her mirror and her amorous vampire. "I told you, I'm running late to work. So, the answer is a big no."

Retrieving her hat from her bedside table, she turned to see Spike opening her window. She let her head fall back and groaned in exasperation. "Oh my god, Spike, what are you doing now?"

"Getting the hell out of here! You think I want to spend the night with that boarding school reject? It's bad enough having the memory of being him, I don't really fancy prancing about the cemeteries with him." As he was talking, he began to swing a leg over the window ledge.

Buffy balled her hands into fists and shook them. "You are so frustrating!" She raised her voice when Spike raised a brow at her. "You are! You are frustrating and...you're a dope!"

Spike brought his leg back inside and squinted at her as if concerned. "Are you completely off your trolley?"

"You keep saying you want to help, but all you do is make it harder." Buffy felt tears fill her eyes and struggled to prevent her voice from wavering. "The first time I went to you for help, you got me drunk, which did nothing! And you keep putting down my job, even though I don't have a choice." Spike opened his mouth to interject but Buffy stopped him with a pointed finger. "No! My turn! Because tonight I need your help. You said you would patrol and William decided he's coming with you. I don't know why he's here, but I'm not playing games with his life. You need to protect him. So just...freaking help me!"

Buffy struggled to catch her breath. She didn't even realize how worked up she had gotten. Her heart was pounding and she was shaking. Looking up at Spike, she stilled under his intense gaze.

"Is that what you think, Slayer?" His voice was low and dangerous. "That I don't help you? All I ever do is bloody help you! I'm your sodding bitch, for crying out loud." As his voice got louder, Buffy flinched. All she could think was that he was her only ally and she had upset him. 

"Maybe I don't need you to be my bitch," she said in a soft voice. Spike visibly deflated. "When I'm with you...everything else, all the numbness I've felt since being back- it goes away. Like just now, I felt angry." She chuckled. "Never thought I'd be glad to feel angry." Buffy took a step toward Spike and held out a placating hand, which he promptly took and squeezed tightly. "Listen, I know we aren't friends, not really. But we are, I don't know, companions? We certainly spend enough time together." They shared a smile. "I'll try to be more honest with you, communicate better. But I need you to help me, especially with this William thing."

Spike scoffed. "By giving him the grand tour of Sunnyhell? Don't I feel useful."

"No, by keeping him safe when I can't. And by helping me make him feel comfortable. You obviously know him best, you can give me some ideas on how to make him feel safe here."

"Why the sodding hell do we care how safe and comfortable he is? We're just going to send him back." Spike shuffled his feet and muttered, "And hopefully get you a memory wipe."

Buffy playfully slapped his chest, earning her a grin from the vampire who promptly grabbed her hand and held it against his unbeating heart. "No memory wipe! William isn't so bad. Spent some time with him today. Once I got over the fact that he looked like you, I was able to come to terms with the fact that he's human. It's my job as a Slayer to protect him." Buffy's eyes grew comically wide. "Oh god, job! I gotta go."

Spike chuckled affectionately as she ran toward the door. Buffy turned around quickly, about to say something, but he beat her to it. "It's alright, love. I'll take care of him." Buffy flashed him one last smile and headed toward the front door, knowing Spike and William would follow her.

**********

"If you guys get home before me tonight, keep it down. Dawn will be back from her friend's house by then. I'll be super pissed if you wake her up," Buffy was saying as they walked toward the Doublemeat. 

"Oh, I shall be glad to see Miss Dawn again. She was very kind," William enthused.

"You stay away from my Niblet, you wanker," Spike threatened his doppleganger. He lit a cigarette and glanced at William. Buffy could see William staring at her out of the corner of her eye. She smothered a smile as she watched Spike's face darken with jealousy. "Stay away from the Slayer, too," he added for good measure.

While William stuttered in embarrassment, Buffy shot Spike a glare. "Shut up, Spike. William can talk to me if he wants to." She smiled reassuringly at William who gave her an uncertain grin back.

Spike flicked his cigarette before taking a long drag. "So long as it's just talking," he growled.

Buffy rolled her eyes in frustration. "And what makes you think you have any say in what William and I say or do?"

"Do?" Spike threw away his cigarette. "There will be no 'doing', " he growled. He curled his tongue behind his teeth and leered at her. "That's my job."

"Oh my," William's voice was faint.

"You're a pig, Spike," Buffy sneered, but without any real venom. In a way, she was having fun. It was surprisingly fun to verbally spar with Spike while prim William was slightly scandalized. That's not very nice, she scolded herself even, as she held in a giggle.

Spike just chuckled. "Already played that tune, love. Try again later." They shared a look of mingled amusement and affection that surprised both of them. Blushing slightly, Buffy continued walking. Doublemeat Palace was just ahead.

"I must say," William suddenly spoke up. "That is not a very polite way to address a lady. I am amazed that she would suffer your company at all."

Buffy and Spike shared a surprised look over William's interjection. Buffy felt oddly touched that he would stand up for her over what was probably serious impropriety in his eyes.

Spike gave a bark of laughter. "Believe me, mate, she doesn't suffer in my company at all. Point of fact, she - "

"Ok, William, listen,” Buffy quickly interrupted to both shut Spike up and get them back on track. “I don't want you to feel any less macho or anything, but listen to Spike tonight. He agreed to take you with him since you're determined, but you need to do as he tells you so that you can stay safe."

William straightened up to his full height and puffed out his chest. "My pride is strong enough to not be hurt by listening to those stronger than myself. I recognize that this Spike is capable of protecting me should the worst happen, and I place myself at his disposal."

"Oh, bollocks," Spike muttered. Louder, he said, "Come on, Nancy boy. Let's leave the lady to her work. If you survive the night, maybe I'll treat you to a drink at Willy's."

William seemed to ponder this before giving Spike a firm nod of approval. "Right. I could use a pint. Onward, my good man." Sheepishly, he turned back to Buffy and gave her a faint bow. "Enjoy your evening, Miss Buffy."

Spike rolled his eyes and took William by the arm to steer him away. At the sound of Buffy's giggle, he looked over his shoulder and shot her a wink.

**********

The house was dark when Buffy finally got home from her late shift. William's soft snores came from the couch. She went over to check on him and almost gagged. He reeked of smoke and alcohol. Spike had definitely dragged him to Willy's. She made a mental note to get him some new clothes and remind him how the shower worked in the morning.

Taking a longer look at him, she was struck by how peaceful his face was in sleep. She never really studied Spike's face before, but this was a perfect opportunity. William didn't have the same edge Spike did, his features seemed softer. Perhaps it was the hair or the lack of a scar on his eyebrow, but Buffy could not look away. She almost giggled to herself when she realized that, in her mind, Spike was hot but William was...well, adorable.

Sneaking upstairs, she checked Dawn's room to make sure her sister was safely asleep in bed before trudging into the shower. Luxuriating in the steam, she scrubbed extra hard to get the grease out of her hair. The hot water helped her to relax her muscles and soothe her mind.

Wrapping her robe around her, she paused in front of the mirror to consider her options. There was a vampire just downstairs, more than willing to relax her muscles better than any hot shower. Or she could go to her room for some much needed sleep. She felt that the choice was obvious. Giving herself a small smile, she quietly made her way to the basement. 

**********

"I think this is the first time we ever made it to a bed."

Spike looked around them where they lay in his cot. "You call this a bed?" He shrugged. "I'll do you in a bed anytime you want, love."

Buffy gave him her patented glare. "Real nice, Spike."

"Come on, you love it." Spike stretched his arms over his head before realizing what he said. He quickly brought his arms back down. "Well, you like it, anyway," he mumbled.

Buffy grinned at him. "It's ok," she teased.

Spike relaxed when he realized she wasn't going to freeze up or run off. "The meat sack told me about your little date earlier."

"Ew, Spike, don't call him that!"

"I'll call him what I bloody well like, he's hitting on my woman." Buffy's head whipped around. "Not that you're mine," he hastened to add. "Just can't imagine what the two of you could have in common. He's not very interesting, and you're....well..." Buffy raised an eyebrow, waiting to find out what Spike thought she was. He stilled and gazed deeply into her eyes. "You're a goddess."

"Oh," Buffy gasped. She felt her breath leave her. She wasn't expecting that, of all things. Spike curled a lock of hair behind her ear and hesitantly gave her a sweet kiss, as if expecting her to push him away at any moment. When he pulled away, the wonder and devotion in his gaze was staggering. Buffy squirmed, slightly uncomfortable with his affection, and pulled the bedsheet higher up on her body, as if to use it as a shield to hide behind. "Poetry," she whispered.

Spike did a double take. "Come again?"

"We have poetry in common." She laughed lightly at the flabbergasted look on Spike's face. "I liked poetry in college, but didn't get to finish my class. So we talked about poetry for a bit."

Spike snorted derisively. "I bet the ponce bored you to tears with his verse. He's bloody pathetic."

"Actually, I think he's sweet," she countered with a small shrug. Spike went completely still and silent. Looking over at him, his face was completely shocked. There was a raw vulnerability in his eyes, a hopefulness that she hadn't seen there in a long time. It was as if a small fire was lit within Spike that he was attempting to hide from her for fear of it being snuffed out. Buffy was strangely moved. She was again struck that there was perhaps more William still within Spike than he liked to show. She found herself wanting to fan that flame.

She gave him another smile, this one a bit sweeter and more affectionate than she had given him in the past. Settling in, she rested her head on his shoulder and laid her leg on his thigh so that she was effectively draped over him. Spike wrapped his arm around her to pull her close and a deep rumbling began in his chest. Buffy didn't want to ruin the moment by commenting, but she swore the vampire was purring.

She felt herself drifting off to sleep with his hand lightly tracing along her arm when he began to speak, his lips softly stirring her hair. 

" ‘There be none of Beauty's daughters

With a magic like Thee; 

And like music on the waters

Is thy sweet voice to me.’"

Smiling to herself, Buffy nuzzled into her vampire and allowed his soft poetry to carry her to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The poem Spike recites is There Be None of Beauty's Daughters by Lord Byron


	5. An Unexpected Guest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is the As You Were chapter and, I gotta day, I had a tough time with it. Tons of dialogue taken from the episode. I am not a big Riley fan, so I lost my thread a bit and started to despair- thanks to my wonderful beta, kats_meow, for pushing and encouraging me. It got hairy for a second. But it had to be done for the story! So onward! I sincerely hope you all enjoy it!

The following day was full of research at the Magic Box to no avail. The Scoobies were fascinated by William. Xander couldn't seem to stop poking him, as if to make sure that William was real. William was a good sport, overall. In fact, he was extremely good at research and had a particular talent for cross referencing. Despite having William help out, the gang did not find anything useful about why William was there or how to send him back. 

Feeling slightly dejected, Buffy and William headed home. William had expressed a desire to cook dinner for his hosts as a thank you for treating him so well. Even Spike came up to sit with the Summers women for dinner. Buffy was forcibly reminded of her mother's cooking as the smell of pork and vegetables filled the house. She couldn't remember the last time she and Dawn had enjoyed a home cooked meal. Sitting at the dining table with a full meal in front of her was such a treat. Everyone chit chatted and had a good time - even Spike kept a civil tongue.

After the meal, Dawn ran upstairs to get her homework done. William insisted on doing the clean up so that Buffy and Spike could relax. Predictably, Spike saw this as an opportunity to try and get Buffy alone.

"Come on, love, let's get away for a bit," he said softly, while tugging her elbow.

Buffy stood her ground from where she was at the kitchen island. "What, now? I don't think so."

"Oh what, are you worried about poor Willy, here?" Spike jeered. Buffy could see William turn his head slightly so as to hear the conversation from where he was at the sink. Spike continued. "He'll be fine, he's a big boy."

"It's rude," Buffy argued. 

Spike sighed. "What's the issue, love? I want you, you want me. There needn't be any obstacles."

Buffy was ready to argue some more, but his intense gaze wore her down. With a rueful look over at William washing the dishes, Buffy squared her shoulders and went downstairs, followed closely by a grinning Spike.

**********

Another night, another Doublemeat shift. Luckily, Buffy was on grill tonight, so she didn't have to interact with customers. She let her mind drift to her sexcapades with Spike in the basement earlier and William's awkwardness around her when she came back upstairs. She chuckled to herself. There was a part of her that felt bad for making William uncomfortable, but it was also so adorable. The whole situation was ridiculous. She couldn't believe her life consisted of having secret sex with Spike and then dancing around his human counterpart, trying to act normal. When she voiced these concerns to Spike, he countered with suggesting that she open up to everyone about their relationship. His look of surprise when Buffy considered what he said instead of instantly rebuking him was completely worth it.

She had to admit to herself that she was beginning to truly enjoy Spike's company. She was actually starting to look forward to spending time with him. And being around William had shown her a side of Spike that she always suspected was there, but was now on display. He may try to hide it, but Spike had a soft side and Buffy was eager to explore it.

Smiling to herself, she nodded to her manager when he asked her to move from grill to counter and moved forward to help the customer that was waiting to order.

"Welcome to Doublemeat Palace, can I take your - " 

Oh. Buffy finally looked at the customer on the other side of the counter and froze. 

"Sorry to drop in on you like this, Buffy," said Riley in his deep baritone.

"It's you." Buffy was in shock, staring dumbfounded at the soldier who had left her.

"It's me."

"You're here."

"I know."

"And...were you always this tall?" Buffy could not get her brain to function. Why was Riley here? And now, now that she was starting to build herself back up, now that she was slowly getting more comfortable with a new relationship?

"Look, this isn't the way I wanted it. But something's come up, something big, and we don't have much time. Understand?"

Buffy just gaped at him, still unable to comprehend what was going on. "Not a word you've said so far."

Riley seemed simultaneously stoic and annoyed with her. "I want to explain but don't have enough time. I'm tracking something bad and now it's come to Sunnydale."

Buffy's mind continued to race. Had Riley returned for her? The men in her life weren't known for returning to her life in a positive way. Should she tell him about how she'd been sleeping with Spike? Oh god, what should she tell Spike? Would Spike think that she was back with Riley? "My hat has a cow."

Riley continued as if he hadn't heard her. So at least that hadn't changed. "I need the best. I need you, Buffy. Can you help me?"

I need you, Buffy. That echoed in her head on a loop. When was the last time someone had told her that they needed her? Elation and self importance flowed through her, prompting her to grab her coat and walk out of the Doublemeat, possibly forever. Even as she marched alongside her ex, the tiny voice in the back of her mind reminded her that she was needed. Dawn needed her, William needed her to protect him until he returned to his time, and Spike...well, he certainly looked at her as if he needed her. She was conflicted by these thoughts even as she exulted in the idea that an ex had realized that he needed her and came back for her. 

Buffy wasn't sure what was going through her mind. If she was thinking rationally, she would have realized that she didn't actually want Riley back. That she needed to make taking care of William a priority, followed closely by figuring out what Spike actually meant to her. But Riley threw her for a loop. She was so shocked by his sudden appearance that her mind was spinning as her body moved on autopilot.

She couldn't help but giggle at him when he fidgeted with his gadgets. When he looked at her, perplexed, she blamed his "James Bond stuff. It's so cute."

Riley seemed to take it in stride. He drove her to a location to fight the Suvolte demon that he was apparently here to find. Buffy didn't really pay attention to anything he told her about the demon, she was too distracted by his flirting. The entire car ride and trek to the location was a flirt fest. Buffy wasn't sure how she felt about it. This was the man that left her. It was flattering to be the center of attention, but she had a vampire at home who had never left her, even when she wanted him to.

So, all that considered, how was she supposed to know she wasn't supposed to kill the stupid demon? Hello, that was kinda what a Slayer did. As if to confuse her even more, Riley had a surprise wife named Sam who showed up at the end of the battle only to tell Buffy that killing this demon was a mistake since they couldn’t follow a dead demon to demon eggs. She felt herself deflate in Sam's presence and reluctantly offered up her house as a safe place to figure out their next steps in finding the demon eggs. Along the way, Riley used his nifty gadgets to contact the Scooby gang so that everyone would be at Buffy's house when they arrived.

Buffy led the way into her house to see the entire gang, plus William and Spike, waiting for them in the living room. Buffy was getting a serious headache. And, of course, Spike spoke up first.

"What the bleeding hell is Captain Cardboard doing here?"

Riley tensed as he turned toward Spike. "I could ask the same question about you." Riley’s eyes shot from Spike to William in confusion. “Uh, about both of you.”

"I'm always around. The Slayer has her...uses for me," Spike sneered. Buffy shot him a warning look to shut him up. Spike chose to ignore it. "I don't leave a lady in need, unlike some people."

Riley took a threatening step forward. "I swear to God, Spike, shut up or I'll..."

"You'll what? Stake me again?"

Sam gasped. "Stake? Finn, is he a vampire?"

As Riley turned to update his wife, Buffy interjected. "Excuse me? You staked him?"

Riley didn't seem to like the horrified looks Buffy was shooting at Spike, who looked touched at her outrage. He stepped between Buffy and Spike so that the Slayer was forced to look at him. "It was plastic woodgrain. It wasn't real, Buffy, I knew he wouldn't dust. Besides, what do you care? He's a monster!"

Before Buffy could reply, Sam spoke up. "Finn? Can I have a word?" Sam did not sound like a happy wife. Riley's shoulders slumped as he led Sam into the kitchen so that husband and wife could have a private conversation.

"Thanks, love," Spike said softly. "I don't know if you meant it, but it seemed like you cared just then, and that's..." His voice trailed off.

Buffy smiled softly at him. "If anyone is gonna stake you, it's gonna be me."

"Oh, promises promises," Spike's eyes glittered.

Xander waved a hand in front of his body in typical Xander confusion. "Does anyone else feel like they're missing something?"

Anya shrugged and nodded as Willow followed up with, "Yeah, Buffy, what's going on? It's weird to get a call from Riley, of all people." She lowered her voice conspiratorially. "Just so you know, I'm prepared to hate that woman any way you want."

"Thanks, Will, go nuts," Buffy whispered. Spike snorted softly behind her. Rolling her eyes at the vampire, she opted to otherwise ignore him and catch the gang up on what the deal was with the Suvolte demon and the eggs.

"So we need to find these eggs before they're sold to some weapons dealer," Buffy finished. "From what the happy couple told me on the way over here, the weapons are the equivalent of weapons of mass destruction and they may already be in the hands of a dealer who goes by the name of The Doctor." She turned to Spike and Anya. "Do either of you guys know anyone called that?" They both shook their heads.

"And how do we know that we can trust this Riley fellow?" a voice piped up. Buffy jumped. She had completely forgotten that William was there.

"Again, I could ask the same of you," Riley countered as he and Sam returned to the living room. He glared at Buffy. "One annoying vampire wasn't enough, so you, what, cloned him? And made him more pathetic?"

William deflated under Riley's criticism, enraging Buffy. "It's none of your business what is going on with Spike. You lost all rights to my life when you walked out of it." She looked over at Spike who was watching her with pride and wonder. "I bet Spike agrees with me."

Spike drew himself up. "Yeah, Soldier Boy, butt out," he crowed. "And leave the other me out of this." He shot William a grin that William tremulously returned.

"That's enough," Sam sternly interrupted. "The important thing here is the Suvolte eggs. We get those, and Finn and I will leave the rest of you to your little soap opera."

"Sam's right. Buffy, why don't you and Sam patrol the cemeteries. I'll check out some crypts and abandoned houses that I know demons like to hide in," Riley offered.

Buffy was about to argue about having a Sam chaperone when she saw William move. He seemed to be having a whispered argument with Spike, continuously nudging the vampire forward. She caught Spike's eye and raised an eyebrow at him. Spike rolled his eyes and said, "The Slayer and me are a package deal. I'm patrolling with the birds."

William gave him a huge smile and sat back down. "I shall hold down the fort here, as it were."

Riley looked like he was going to argue before he set his jaw in annoyance. "Fine." He turned to the other Scoobies. "You guys check out the demon bars and then you can go home. Call this number if you find out anything."

Everyone gave the affirmative and headed out. Spike pushed past Buffy to meet Sam outside for patrol. Before heading out, Buffy spared one last look over at William.

"Better go, Miss Buffy. The sooner you solve this problem, the sooner we can figure out my issue," he said.

Buffy nodded and turned to leave. "Take care of Spike," William's voice floated after her. She froze and looked back at him. He shot her a wink, which forced a giggle out of her. She was certainly not expecting that from the prim and proper Victorian man.

"Right, let's go," said Spike once Buffy joined them. Looking at Sam, Buffy gritted her teeth and forged on.

**********

"Wow, Buffy, I gotta say...I'm a little intimidated. Patrolling with the real live Slayer. You're like Santa or the Buddha or something."

Buffy sighed. Sam has been going on and on ever since they left the house. "Fat and jolly?" Spike snorted in amusement from beside her. What a load of help he’d been. He just let Sam gush about how great it was being around the Slayer without any reaction other than the odd snort or dark chuckle. Buffy glared at him.

"Legendary," Sam countered. 

Buffy shrugged. Enough was enough. Being put on a pedestal by her ex's wife was exhausting her. "You know what, Sam, I think we should split up." Spike looked up in interest. Sam seemed crestfallen.

"Oh. I'm slowing you down. I knew I would. This was just selfish of me."

"No, it's not. There's this guy, uh, an informant, and he's twitchy."

"Cool. I should go find Finn, I'm sure he needs saving right about now." And, just like that, Buffy got rid of Sam.

"Nicely done, Slayer. Couldn't wait to get me alone, eh?" Spike sidled closer to her.

"Shut up, Spike," she countered without venom. "She was grating on me. This whole night is exhausting. Let's just find these stupid eggs so that Riley and his perfect wife can get out of here."

Spike tilted his head as he considered her. "She's not perfect, pet," he assured her softly. "Not even close. She's cardboard, just like Riley. And if he chooses to spend his life as a Captain America stereotype, that's his loss. It's nothing on you."

Buffy shot Spike a grateful smile. "Well, once they're gone, we can go back to figuring out what's going on with William. Speaking of," her smile widened, "I saw him nudging you so that you would come out here with me. You two seem to be getting along better," she teased.

"Well, in the end, he's me, isn't he? I always did enjoy talking to myself."

Buffy laughed, reveling in the light feeling that flowed through her as she joked around with Spike. She really was getting more comfortable around him. Spike gave her a soft knowing smile before giving a small shrug and picking up his pace.

"Alright, let's move on, then. Get Captain Cardboard back to where he came from. Just gotta swing by the crypt for a mo'. Something I need." He waggled his eyebrows at Buffy. "Maybe while we're there, we could..."

"A world of no," Buffy answered. "Nothing that's gonna delay the awkwardness that is Sunnydale tonight."

They reached Spike's crypt, Spike leading her by the hand. "Come on, love," he wheedled, pulling her into the crypt and against his body, "we have some time."

Buffy hesitated for only a moment before giving in and meeting him in a passionate kiss. Feeling his tongue slip into her mouth was absolute bliss. She swore she would never get used to what a fantastic kisser Spike was. Moaning, she pressed herself against him and held him even tighter. She felt herself getting lost in him when someone in the shadows cleared their throat.

Buffy and Spike sprung apart, ready for action. Buffy felt dread course through her body as Riley stepped out of the shadows with the largest gun she had ever seen. His facial expression did not look promising. Predictably, Spike recovered from his shock first.

"Well, looky here. I don't usually use the word delicious, but I've got to wager this little tableau's got to sting, eh? Me and your former. Must kill. What can I say? The girl just needs a little monster in her man."

Riley's scowl deepened. "That's not why I'm here. Doctor."

Buffy gaped at both of them, shock and disbelief overwhelming her. "Excuse me?" she blurted.

Riley ignored her as if she hadn't spoken. "Where are they? Doctor?"

Buffy took a step toward Riley, trying to make sense of the situation. "The Doctor, it can't be Spike."

"There's no need to defend me, love," Spike said softly, touching her on the arm.

Buffy was still dumbfounded by Riley's accusation. "But it can't be. It's Spike, Riley!"

Riley took a few steps forward and glowered at the couple. "Right. Deadly, amoral, opportunistic. Or have you forgotten?" Riley looked around him as if the eggs were going to magically appear in front of his eyes. "I'm taking this place apart until I find that nest."

Spike lunged forward so that he was eye to eye with the soldier. "Over my dead body."

Riley pushed past him to get to the trapdoor that led to the crypt's lower level. "That can be arranged."

"Riley, stop!" Buffy tried again, but Riley wasn't listening. After sharing an exasperated look with Spike, she followed him to the lower level.

Reaching the area that was Spike's bedroom before the William debacle, Buffy pulled up short. On the floor were several slime covered eggs.

"Spike messed up, he didn't keep them frozen," Riley rushed through his words as if in a panic. But something didn't seem right.

"Riley, it couldn't be Spike. He's been at my house for the last several days."

"What the bleeding hell is this?" Spike had caught up to them and taken in the scene. "What the hell are those and why are they in my crypt?" He glared at Riley. "You wanker! You set me up!"

Buffy turned wide, accusing eyes on Riley, who was in a glaring contest with Spike. "Well?" she prompted. "Did you set him up?"

Riley didn't even look at her. "Of course not," he sneered, still glaring at Spike. "I tracked the eggs and found them here. I'm not even surprised."

Buffy took a step toward the two males. Spike was beginning to growl threateningly. "But, Riley, when we got here, you were already here. You were just kinda creeping in the shadows."

Spike looked at her swiftly before rounding on Riley again. "Yeah, girl's got a point. What were you doing here?"

Riley answered by swinging his gun up to point at Spike. Before the situation could escalate any further, the sound of eggs cracking made everyone freeze and slowly turn to look at the hatching nest. 

"We won't be able to contain this, we will have to destroy them. Here!" Riley quickly thrust a gun at Buffy and began backing away to get a better shot.

"Don't I get a weapon?" Spike snarked at him.

Buffy tried to shoot at the hatching demons but only succeeded in destroying Spike's possessions (with many indignant "Hey!"s coming from the vampire). Finally, she gave up. "These things," she said, holding up the weapon, "never useful." She started using the gun to hit the demons, seeing Spike fighting out of the corner of her eye.

"Evacuate! Retreat!" Riley shouted, holding up a grenade.

"Oh, bloody hell!" Spike shouted when he saw it. He grabbed Buffy by the elbow and started pulling her toward the ladder. "Time to go, love."

Buffy and Spike bolted out of the crypt, followed closely by Riley. The explosion that emanated from under the crypt had a sense of finality about it as Spike's home was ruined. Anger lined the vampire's face as he looked at his former home. Buffy felt herself shaking at the injustice of it. Furious, she turned toward Riley."Get the hell away from me."

"Buffy, I - "

"No. I don't want to hear it. You come back into town without warning and surprise me at my work. You flirt with me and lead me on only to blindside me with a wife. You set Spike up over a stupid prank or whatever you were trying to pull, and then you blow up his home. You are pathetic, Riley. Fetch your perfect little wife and get out of my town."

Spike straightened up and stared at Buffy with an intensity that she felt deep in her bones. It wasn't often that she stood up for him, but this was ridiculous. Here was a vampire that stood by her through everything getting hazed by an ex-boyfriend with a fondness for gaslighting. She would previously have been concerned that Spike would get the wrong idea, but she honestly didn't think the idea would be so wrong. The fact was that she had grown to care for him and Riley had wronged him. So Buffy figured it was time for Riley to go.

"Buffy, can we just - " Riley tried again.

"No." Buffy held up a hand to stop him and slowly shook her head. "Just go, Riley."

Riley sighed, set his jaw, and nodded once. Fiddling with some gadget, Riley went off, probably to track down Sam and get out of Dodge. 

Still shaking, Buffy turned to Spike who hadn't spared Riley a second glance. "Well, that was interesting," he drawled.

"Spike," Buffy started. She saw Spike tense up, as if expecting rebuke. She held out her hand to him, which he gingerly took. "Let's go home."


	6. The Rainbow After the Storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew! This chapter was a complete surprise to me! It wasn’t initially in my outline, but Riley seriously bummed me out. I felt like I could really use a light and fluffy piece, so here we go.
> 
> Special thanks to kats_meow, as always!
> 
> And sorry for all the unanswered comments! I do see all of them and love and appreciate all of you. Life has been a bit crazy- you’ll notice I’m now consistently late with updates. Please don’t stop reviewing, I do see you!!

The next couple days were relatively uneventful. Buffy finally felt like she had some time to think about everything that had happened with Spike. After much self reflection on how she and her friends had treated Spike in the past, she was left with the conclusion that it just wasn't fair. She realized that they had never treated Spike well or given him an opportunity to belong. After proving his loyalty throughout the Glory debacle and staying by her side through her trauma and depression after coming back from heaven, Spike deserved to be treated better. And, for her part, Buffy was suddenly extremely interested in what Spike would do given the chance.

As for tonight, it was an unexpected girls' night. Anya had come over, wanting to talk about the wedding. Buffy, Anya, and Dawn were up in Buffy's room, talking about the bridesmaids' dresses. Willow had bowed out earlier. Ever since she had moved out, Buffy was seeing less and less of her best friend. To be fair, she hadn't felt very close to Willow since her resurrection. It was actually surprisingly easy to sit up in her room and talk to Anya. At least Anya was up front about how she felt and she was pretty non-judgmental. 

As it was, Anya seemed particularly unperturbed by having both Spike and William around. When she arrived for the impromptu girls' night, she'd insisted that Spike come to the wedding.

"The more guests there are, the more gifts! Besides, you have been helping us fight evil for a while now, it would be rude not to invite you."

"I don't know, pet." Spike had shuffled his feet a bit. "Are you sure you want a vampire at your shindig?"

Anya had nodded enthusiastically. "Of course I want you there, Spike. You and I are both outsiders in the inner workings of the humans' little gang. I would like someone at my wedding who understands me."

Spike had relaxed and given Anya a sweet smile. "I never could turn down a lady," he'd said in a deep voice. Buffy had looked down at her lap. She never realized that Spike and Anya felt like outsiders. Well, Spike she could understand. He was always being insulted or pushed out of their little group. But Buffy thought they treated Anya with respect and made her feel welcome. Although, thinking about it, they never really listened to Anya or took her seriously. She was always ignored or shushed. This gave Buffy's mind something to chew on while she continued to listen to Anya include her fellow outsider. 

Anya hadn't been done surprising everyone. "Of course, William must come, too."

William's head had jerked up from the book he was reading, gasping out a "beg your pardon?" in unison with Spike's "what's that, then?"

Spike later dragged a surprised yet thrilled William off with him to play poker, leaving the ladies to discuss wedding plans. Dawn seemed to really enjoy being a part of the conversation, but eventually had to leave to finish her homework and get ready for bed. 

Buffy figured she could bring up something that had been bugging her. Anya wasn't likely to judge her.

"I was, um, moved by what you said to Spike earlier."

"What’s that?" Anya asked distractedly while flipping through bridal magazines.

"About not feeling a part of our group. I have been thinking a lot lately about how we never really gave Spike a chance, never cut him any slack."

"Uh huh," Anya answered noncommittally.

Buffy tried a different tact. "Do you think we should?"

"Should what?"

"Cut Spike some slack?"

"Yes."

Buffy was taken aback by Anya's firm answer and lack of hesitation. "Yes? Just like that? Even though he's a vampire? But he doesn't have a soul, how could I ever trust him?"

Anya threw her magazine down. "This wedding is giving me a lot of stress and I need to concentrate. So I am only going to say this once. How much does Spike have to prove himself to you before you give him a break? Sheesh, you guys didn't give me half as hard of a time as you give him...and I killed way more people. And I never got a soul, so I don't see why you're hung up on that."

"You didn't?!" Buffy yelped.

Anya considered her answer for a moment. "I don't think so. I don't feel any remorse for all those years. But I wouldn't go back to killing people because it would hurt Xander. And if you really think about it, that's what's happening with Spike. No remorse, but he doesn't want to hurt you. So give the guy a break."

"I guess." Buffy allowed, trying to hide her shock at the implications of what Anya just said. Anya’s been soulless all this time?! "I've been thinking along the same lines, really. It's just hard to jump that hurdle and get into 'Go, Spike, Go' territory."

Anya gave her a sidelong look before picking her magazine up again. "Do you like William?"

"Wh- huh?" Buffy was confused by the topic change.

"Just saying, if you wouldn't stake William, you shouldn't stake Spike. They are literally the same person, with or without the soul. Don't believe me, watch how they both look at you. They have the same look in their eyes. Spike hasn't changed all that much. Cut him some slack."

Buffy considered this for a minute. "Ok," she decided suddenly, "that's fair. What do you suggest?"

Anya looked up from her magazine. "You're asking me? You are asking for my advice...and you'll actually follow it?"

Buffy laughed. "Yes, as long as it has nothing to do with orgasms."

"Oh, you already get enough of those from Spike, it's plain as day." Anya waved a nonchalant hand at a shocked Buffy. "Well, I guess you could start by getting to know both William and Spike better, reconcile them in your mind, and see how alike they truly are. My wedding should be a good time to do that. Give them equal time. Just choose moments that aren't about me. It is my wedding, you know."

"No, no! I won't take any attention away from your special day," Buffy assured her.

"Good!" Anya chirped. "So, if we are all done talking about you, you can tell me what you think of this." 

Relieved and amused, Buffy gladly leaned in to look at Anya's magazine so that they could lose themselves in much needed girl talk.

*****

Buffy's brain was spinning as she relaxed in her room later. Anya had certainly given her a lot to think about. Not the least of which was where she stood with Spike. Was his soul really that big a deal? Despite herself, she was starting to think that things might not be as black and white as she always thought. Spike had shown time and again how much he loved her. And, if William was any indication, Spike could be capable of being astonishingly sweet.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a soft knock at her bedroom door. Opening it revealed Spike holding a bouquet of wildflowers, looking for all the world as if he had picked them himself. Huh, she thought to herself, case in point. 

Spike wordlessly thrust the flowers at her, shuffling his weight from foot to foot as if nervous. Buffy took them with a smile. "These are nice." she smiled. "Let me guess. They were William's idea, but he was too shy to come give them to me himself?"

A cloud drifted over Spike's face, closing off his nervous expression into something darker. "Oh, I see. Only a human could be capable of thinking of you or wanting to do something nice? Sod off, Slayer."

As Spike turned to go, Buffy realized what she had implied and grabbed his arm to stop him. "No, Spike, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that." Spike eyed her cautiously. "I'm sorry, really. I was trying to be witty or funny. Guess I'm off my game tonight."

Spike shrugged easily and relaxed, brushing past her to let himself into her room. Buffy rolled her eyes and closed the door behind him. Spike did a tense lap around the room as if pacing would break the slight tension that had formed after Buffy's failed joke attempt. He turned to give Buffy a once over and gave her a sly grin. "So what are you doing up here, all on your lonesome?"

Buffy shrugged and sat on the end of her bed. She had resolved to give Spike a chance. Time to be honest and see what he did when she expressed vulnerability. "That's just it. I was sitting here, feeling lonesome."

Spike furrowed his brow in concern and sat beside her. "What's going on, pet?"

It was a huge relief to realize that he wasn't going to mock her or make dirty jokes about her being lonely. Feeling like she could talk to him, Buffy relaxed and decided to open up. "This whole wedding. One of my best friends is about to go live happily ever after. All I can think is that I have boy repellant and a drastically shortened life span. I'm never going to have that." She looked up into his eyes, seeing only love and concern. "You of all people know how good I am at pushing everyone away. So, yeah. Guess I'm happy for Xander and Anya, but I still feel kinda...lonely."

"Well, pet," Spike shifted so he could see her better. "Doesn't have to be like that. Plenty of people who love you and want to be around you. And you know that I'm immune to your little repellant. If you want, I'll stick around." He lowered his chin and looked at her imploringly. 

Buffy felt warmth flow through her. "I think I want," she whispered, watching Spike's face light up with hope and cautious joy. She stood up to put the flowers on her nightstand before turning back to him. "Would you stay here tonight?"

Spike smiled and stood up, shucking off his leather jacket. "Sure, love. Let's keep the loneliness demons at bay, yeah?"

Buffy chuckled and allowed herself to snuggle into and be comforted by Spike. Feeling him stroke her hair soothingly, she was struck by a thought. "Wow," she gasped.

"Hmm?"

"You really love me."

Spike pulled back to look at her as if she was crazy. "And where have you been?"

Buffy laughed. "I know you've said it before. I'm just thinking about it all and it kinda clicked." She paused to ponder her next thought before deciding to just blurt it out. "Do you think William does, too?"

Spike snorted. "He's me, isn't he?"

Buffy smiled at the thought and snuggled in closer to her vampire as sleep overtook her. 

**********

When Buffy woke up the next morning, her room had a soft glow from the sun shining against the closed curtains. She felt so warm and cozy that she couldn't imagine getting up for anything. She drowsily snuggled back into her pillows.

"Mmm, Buffy..."

Buffy nearly jumped out of her skin. She had completely forgotten that she fell asleep cuddled up with a vampire. Looking over her shoulder at him, she sighed in relief that she hadn't accidentally woken him up. His arm tightened around her waist so that he could press himself against her in his sleep. Buffy felt a flush of warmth and desire when his morning wood poked at her backside through their clothes. She smiled to herself and shuffled as far back as she could to grind against him.

"Don't start what you can't finish, love," came Spike's sleepy voice. 

Buffy giggled and turned around to face him. She traced a finger along the scar on his eyebrow, leading him to lazily open his eyes and grin at her. She gave his forehead a soft kiss and responded, "I don't intend to."

Spike's smile widened. Leaning in, he brushed his lips lightly against hers, leading her into a gentle kiss. The kiss gradually increased in intensity, Buffy moaning as Spike slowly slid his tongue into her mouth. She allowed her hands to tangle in his hair, giving the strands gentle tugs. Spike smiled into the kiss and pulled her closer.

Buffy felt heat flood through her core. Spike had a lot of tactics for getting her hot, but smiling into her kiss made her feel particularly amorous. She brought her hands out of his hair, traveling down his neck and arms. She took her time feeling the vulnerable softness of the skin on his neck, enjoying the hard, smooth muscles of his biceps, before finally letting her hands settle on his narrow hips. Pulling back from his kiss, she gave him a wicked grin and reached around to grab his ass and push his hips forward. 

Spike groaned in response. Leaning in, he gave her a gentle nip on her bottom lip and growled, "Pants off, Slayer. Now."

Buffy giggled and gave his waistband a hearty tug. "What's good for the goose is good for the gander," she quipped, reaching down to her own pants so that she could begin wiggling out.

"Yeah, well, you're a silly goose!" Spike froze and looked over at Buffy, who quirked an eyebrow at him. "Bugger. Just pretend I didn't say that."

"Gladly," Buffy laughed. 

They both managed to shimmy out of their pants without getting up. Once they settled back against each other, Spike lifted a hand to reverently cup Buffy's cheek. "So bloody beautiful," he murmured. "I love you, Summers."

Buffy gave him a soft smile. "I'm starting to get that." She gazed at him, finally allowing herself to be honest about how she felt. She spent so much time since her resurrection feeling alone and empty, but that wasn't happening now. Here, in Spike's arms, she felt warm and loved. She felt extraordinarily grateful and affectionate towards him for making her feel like that. 

Unwilling to break eye contact, she lifted her leg to hook over his hip. She gasped in surprise as Spike's fingers seemed to come out of nowhere to brush the folds between her legs.

"Christ, Slayer, you're already so wet for me," he groaned, throwing his head back and closing his eyes.

"Call me Buffy," she panted. His head jolted up and his eyes flew open as he regarded her with amazement. She shrugged, not wanting to ruin the moment. "I'm here with you, Spike. Use my name."

Spike's smile put the sun to shame. "Buffy," he breathed. Without another word, he took his hand from between her legs and positioned himself at her opening. 

Buffy inhaled sharply as his cock slid into her. After taking a moment to adjust to the intrusion, they started rocking together. Buffy gasped and moaned as pleasure rocketed up her spine. She knew that Spike was a particularly gifted partner, but she had never let him be soft or tender during sex before. It was a completely different experience, one she was eager to repeat. Still gazing into his crystal blue eyes, she felt the adoration she found there add to her physical pleasure. She hid the sudden tears that sprang to her eyes by leaning in for a passionate kiss as her emotions began to overwhelm her. No partner had ever made her feel so cherished. 

They reached their climax almost simultaneously, Buffy reflexively reaching up to grasp the back of Spike's head as he shifted to kiss her neck. They panted in unison as they came down from their high, neither one willing to release their hold of the other. 

Spike shifted so that Buffy was on her back and he could rest his head on her shoulder. "Well, that was a first," he said, not meeting her eyes.

Buffy absently stroked his hair, ducking her chin to try and see his face better. "Oh?"

"I don't mean...obviously it wasn't the first time we..." Spike sputtered for a moment before heaving a shuddering sigh. "It was the first time we've ever made love."

Buffy smiled tenderly. "You know what? You're right."

Spike propped himself up on an elbow to get a better look at her. "Why, Buffy? What does this mean?"

Buffy looked away from the hope in his eyes. She knew she was beginning to harbor softer feelings for the vampire, but he was already all in. She didn't want to say anything that might get him too excited when she wasn't exactly at his level yet. 

"You have William to thank for that."

"Oi!" Spike pulled back indignantly. "You take that back!"

"Oh, calm down," Buffy laughed. "I mean, spending time with William has shown me a side of you that I don't usually see. A softer side that you hide. It makes me relate to you a bit more, see you as more than just a blood sucking fiend," she finished in a teasing tone.

Spike settled back in and grumbled, "So long as you don't shag him anytime soon. You're mine."

Buffy rolled her eyes and resumed stroking his hair. "No, I won't shag him. He's helping me understand you and all… But I think I prefer the whole Spike package. There's William in you, but there's more, as well. So calm down and stop getting jealous of yourself."

"Damn straight," a slightly mollified Spike said against her collar bone before giving the juncture of her neck and shoulder a gentle kiss.

Knock, knock!

"Ugh, what, Dawn?!" Buffy called out.

"Get up, lazy! We need to get ready for the wedding!" 

Buffy sighed as she listened to Dawn's footsteps go down the stairs to wake up William. She eyed the dress hanging on her closet door before turning to meet Spike's amused eyes. 

"Slayer, you're going to look - "

"Shut up, Spike."

Spike barked out a laugh before bringing his hand up to cup her cheek again. "I'll let you doll yourself up. Meet you at the wedding, yeah?" He got up and started to put his pants back on.

"Spike," Buffy reached out and grabbed his hand before he could leave. He looked at her, tilting his head slightly in confusion. "I'll save you a dance."

His smile lit up his face. "Of course you will, love."

As the door clicked shut behind him, Buffy smiled and whispered to herself, "It's all we've ever done."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Squeeee! Some fluff and some sexy time! As soon as I was done with this chapter, I was glad I did it...it gets our darling Spuffy where we need to be! Hope you enjoyed it!


	7. Wedding Bells Are Ringing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, here it is. The expositional chapter! Where everyone says “Ooooooh!”
> 
> Super huge thanks to kats_meow for helping me out!!

Buffy breathed a sigh of relief from where she sat next to William. Xander and Anya's wedding had thankfully gone off without a hitch. She wasn't sure if having this many demons in the same room was such a good idea, but she hadn't had to slay any of the wedding guests so far. She chose to sit next to William at the reception rather than at the high table. The shy little looks he sent her during the ceremony had given her butterflies in her stomach, so she was eager to spend some time with him. She loved the friendship that has blossomed between them and wanted to get to know him better before his inevitable return to Victorian England. Also, she had to admit that she enjoyed the insight being with William gave her into Spike’s softer side.

"I daresay that you look absolutely lovely, Miss Buffy," he said eagerly.

Buffy smiled warmly. "Thank you, William. That's really sweet of you to say, even when I am dressed in neon green."

William blushed and looked down at his plate, muttering something about how she would look good in anything. Buffy's smile widened at his bashfulness. 

Looking away from him for a moment, she allowed her gaze to scan the room.

"Have you seen Spike at all?" she asked. When her question was met only with silence, she looked back at William to see him looking at her with a sweet sadness. "William? What's wrong?"

William gave a small shrug as if to downplay his emotions. "I apologize for not providing stimulating enough conversation. The reception has barely begun and you are already looking for another companion."

Buffy instantly felt ashamed. "Oh, no, William! I didn't mean it like that! It's just..." She paused, wondering how to tread delicately through this conversation. "Spike and I have been...getting closer."

"I think I understand," William mused. "I knew that you two were having...er...relations. Perhaps you have started to open up to the possibility that you may have softer feelings for him?"

Buffy smiled and nodded. "You know what? I couldn't have said it better myself."

William shifted in his seat. "You know that Spike and I are essentially the same person, with a few obvious differences. If you care so deeply for him, do you suppose you could ever - "

"Oh my god, Buffy, you are the talk of the party!" Dawn gushed as she plopped down at their table. Buffy glanced over at William, who was beginning to deflate in his chair. Any confidence he had gained during their conversation was blown away by the tornado of teenage Dawn.

"I'm - huh?"

"Look at the head table!" Dawn enthused. "Xander and Willow look so annoyed that you're sitting with William. Especially Xander. Hey, do you think if Xander puffs up in anger anymore, his cumberbund will bust?"

Buffy laughed at the image and saw William smiling out of the corner of her eye. "Why do they car if I'm sitting with William?"

Dawn shrugged, reaching across the table to snag a dinner roll. She took such a huge bite, Buffy was amazed she didn't choke. "It's gotta be the 'Buffy having a life' thing," Dawn said around a chunk of roll. "You know you're not allowed to have a personal life outside of them. It makes them grumpy."

"Does it?" Buffy raised an eyebrow. "Well, let's see how grumpy they can get! William, wanna dance?"

William drew himself up. "No."

"No?" Buffy did a legitimate double take. "No, as in, you don't want to dance?"

Dawn's eyes went wide as she looked between the two of them as if at a tennis match. 

"Precisely. I do not want to dance with someone who would merely use me to prove a point to her friends." Bravely, William looked her in the eye. "I may not be Spike, Miss, but I am still a person with feelings. Feelings for you."

Shame swept through Buffy for the second time that night. She was really Foot-In-Mouth-Girl today and she hastened to apologize. "Oh, William, I'm so sorry. I'm saying everything wrong. You're right, you're so much more than a tool to manipulate my friends. But I really do want to dance with you!" William looked cautiously hopeful. "Is that ok? Would you accept my apology and dance with me?"

"Miss Buffy," William said cordially, "I wholeheartedly accept your apology and understand completely. It would be my absolute pleasure to dance with you." He stood and, with a small bow, extended a hand to her.

Dawn squealed and clapped her hands in excitement when Buffy took his hand. Buffy turned to give her an exasperated look which Dawn promptly returned. "What?" Dawn shot at her. "It's about time you relaxed and had some fun. You deserve it."

And, with that, Buffy allowed herself to be swept onto the dance floor by William. Getting into position, Buffy rolled her eyes at how formal William was. Seriously, a continent would fit between them. A slow song started and Buffy took the opportunity to pull William closer. Despite his stammering and blushing, Buffy suspected he liked it from how his arm around her tightened. 

"I must get something off my chest, Miss Buffy. I fear that if I do not say it now, then I shall lose all nerve."

Buffy tilted her head to look William in the eye. Taking a deep breath, she nodded.

"My time with you has been extraordinary and, at times, frightening. But you have been my rock, my guide, through this fearful world. And seeing what I become, this Spike...well, I shall not hide from you that I was frightened and disgusted at the creature that shares my features. However, I am comforted that the affection of a good woman has tamed the beast. I am grateful that I can look forward to sharing your attentions in the future."

"Oh, William, no," Buffy shook her head. "It wasn't my affections or, whatever you said, that makes Spike act the way he does. He chooses to fight on the side of good because of you, because of the William that still resides within him. I see it now. Yes, he's a demon, but he's also you." Buffy looked away, slightly embarrassed. "If you hadn't come here, I don't think I would have seen that."

William set his jaw and stated his argument. "That may be, Miss Buffy. I would like to think that my character is strong enough to overcome a demon. Regardless, it is plain to all that all of Spike loves you - the demon...and, well...the William, too." He looked deep into her eyes. There was no possible way to mistake his meaning.

"I...um...I don't think I know what to say," Buffy stuttered. "I really care for you, William. But you have to know you won't be here forever. I don't want to get too close and have anyone get hurt when you go back home." Buffy felt her throat burn as she said the words, fighting tears. She knew she wasn't falling for William the way she was for Spike. But, if she was honest for herself, she would have had a much more difficult time accessing the softer side of Spike without meeting William first.

William smiled tremulously. “I understand, Miss Buffy. I just wanted you to know how I feel. And, should I suddenly disappear to go back home without a chance to tell you, I want to give you a form of closure. I actually look forward to the day that I am Spike and earn my way to your side. You see"- he winked - "wishing you every happiness would be wishing happiness on myself."

Buffy laughed through the tears she was fighting. She tightened her grip on him and laid her head on his shoulder, unwilling to think about the day that he returned to his own time. Suddenly, she could hear him whisper, his breath tickling her ear.

“O my Luve is like a red, red rose 

That’s newly sprung in June; 

O my Luve is like the melody 

That’s sweetly played in tune. 

So fair art thou, my bonnie lass, 

So deep in luve am I; 

And I will luve thee still, my dear, 

Till a’ the seas gang dry. 

Till a’ the seas gang dry, my dear, 

And the rocks melt wi’ the sun; 

I will love thee still, my dear, 

While the sands o’ life shall run. 

And fare thee weel, my only luve! 

And fare thee weel awhile! 

And I will come again, my luve, 

Though it were ten thousand mile.”

"That was beautiful," Buffy sighed. She looked William in the eye. "I'll be so sad when you have to leave us."

William smiled at something over her shoulder. "I think you'll be just fine." He released her, took a step back, and bowed out. Buffy watched him leave the dance floor in confusion until she heard someone clear his throat from behind her. Swirling around, she found herself caught up in Spike's arms.

"Mind if I have this dance, love?"

"Well, I did promise, didn't I?" Buffy teased back. Unlike William, Spike had no problem pulling Buffy close before sweeping her across the dance floor. "Where have you been?"

Spike shrugged noncommittally. "I got held up. I meant to cut in on you and Willy sooner, but I got stuck talking to Clem. Been a while since I've seen the bloke, it was good to catch up." He smirked and started to inch the hand on her back down toward her backside. "But this is better."

Buffy sighed in exasperation and moved his hand back up to a respectable position. "Stop that!"

"What, afraid your friends will see?"

"No, it's not that...actually, I think I'm getting to be okay with them knowing about us."

Spike raised an eyebrow. "That so?"

Buffy smiled reassuringly. "Yeah. That's so."

Spike's features seemed to light up from within. His eyes took her in as his face softened in awe. "You're so beautiful," he breathed. "You are finally starting to look happy, love. It suits you." He cocked his head to the side as he studied her. "You glow."

Buffy snorted. "That's because the dress is radioactive." They shared a laugh, both relishing how comfortable they had become with each other. Slowly, deliberately, Buffy rested her head on his shoulder as they continued to dance.

Feeling as though she was floating on air, Buffy allowed her eyes to close. Spike's strong arms enveloped her, making her feel safe and loved. Towards the end of the song, Spike tensed, muscles clenching beneath Buffy's hands.

"Oh, bugger."

Buffy lifted her head to look at him. "What? What is it?" 

Instead of answering, Spike growled without looking at her and marched off. Bewildered, Buffy spun around to see where he was going. He was stalking toward where William was talking with that demon that had cursed everyone on Buffy's birthday. What was her name...Halsic...Halrek...Halfrek! She remembered now. She couldn't see what would make Spike upset. As long as William didn't make a wish, they should all be fine.

Hustling so that she could catch up with Spike, she was soon close enough to catch the conversation. Once she was able to hear everything, she had to admit that William sounded distressed.

"We can work together to figure out how we came to be here! Oh, Miss Cecily, I am so sorry you got caught up in this nonsense!"

Halfrek rolled her eyes. "Good God, William, you're just as annoying as I remember. Scamper off and leave me alone."

"But - "

"What the bleeding hell is going on here?" Spike reached the pair with Buffy in tow. The look in his eyes was terrifying to behold. He looked ready to kill.

"Oh, William...sorry, I forgot. You go by Spike now, don't you?" Halfrek trilled with an annoying giggle. A hand flew to her hair as if to check for unattractive flaws. Buffy's eyes narrowed in jealousy. Was she seriously scamming on Spike?

William looked confused and upset. "I don't understand. Cecily, how do you know Spike already?"

Halfrek ignored him and continued talking to Spike. "I do hope you're enjoying your wish. It would be nice, however, if you kept him away from me."

"Your wish?" Buffy's eyes flew to Spike in surprise. She had expected Spike to know better than to make a wish to a vengeance demon. 

Spike's eyes widened in shock. "I didn't make a sodding wish! The bint is off her trolley." He turned to Halfrek accusingly. "I recognized you at the Slayer's house and went looking for you, sure. Had a bone to pick with you, you righteous hag. You're a bloody menace. Was gonna give you what for. Bad enough you treated me like dirt on your shoe back in the day, but then you went after my Niblet!" Spike bristled up and showed some fang. Pointing at her, he said, "I didn't make a wish, though. I'm not that bloody stupid."

"No," Halfrek conceded, "but you were that bloody drunk."

Everyone froze and stared at her, waiting for her to continue. For his part, Spike looked sheepish. It wouldn't be the first time Spike got hammered and forgot what happened.

Halfrek sighed and began to explain. "You found me at the local demon watering hole - disgusting place - and we ended up talking for old time's sake. Phew, you drank enough to drown a fish! It was almost nothing to get you to wish for something."

William whimpered in confusion and fear. Buffy felt a rush of sympathy and affection and ran over to hold his arm. He shot her a grateful glance before addressing Halfrek. "So, back in my time, you were not human? Have you always been...a...a demon?"

Halfrek rolled her eyes. "Yes, William, keep up. Anyway, you were feeling down because no one treated you right, Spike. You wanted to feel validated and appreciated by the people around you. After all that boo-hooing, it was only too easy to get you to wish for it. And, poof, I brought you William." She shrugged. "I figured showing your little friends your human self would garner some sympathy. Look, at him, he's pathetic."

Spike growled as William deflated where he stood with Buffy. She gave his arm an encouraging squeeze before turning to Halfrek. "Enough. I'm pretty sick of you. You're lucky this is my best friend's wedding or I would slay you." Suddenly, she realized something. "Wait, I thought you only granted wishes to kids?"

"That would be where I came in," a deep voice entered the conversation. Whirling around, Buffy narrowed her eyes threateningly at D'Hoffryn. "I allowed her a special dispensation to help out an old..." - he paused as he sneered at William -"friend."

"What's the catch?" Spike snarled. Halfrek simpered and shared knowing looks with D'Hoffryn. "Come on, now. You didn't send William here for nothing. How does he go back home and what is the bloody catch?"

Halfrek waved a hand as if to brush off Spike's question. "William will be here as long as he's needed! Once you feel as if your companions respect and appreciate you, he will be transported back to his time. He will have done his job of showing your little humans how human you can be since they wouldn't take the time to see it otherwise. It's win-win. You get justice and live happily ever after with the respect of your pathetic friends and William gets popped back home with no memory of what happened." She smiled to herself. "Although, I will say that the time is relative. The amount of time spent here will correspond with the amount of time spent back in the 1800's. If he spends, say, a month here, it will be a month later in his time when he returns." She cocked her head curiously. "Does that count as a catch?"

Buffy found herself growling as well. "Bullshit. I know how vengeance demons work, there's always some kind of trick."

Halfrek held up her hands defensively. "There is no trick. Oh, and we prefer to be called justice demons. In case you forgot."

"Although," D'Hoffryn chuckled, "it will be interesting to see what the effects of the paradox will be."

"Paradox?" William gulped.

"Well, your existence here shall last only so long as it takes for Spike to feel appreciated by his insipid humans. What shall happen if you're in this time so long that you miss out on being sired? If you're here too long...does Spike cease to exist? After all, you are his direct past." D'Hoffryn put a finger to his lips thoughtfully. "It poses an interesting question. What if you die here? I believe that Spike would cease to exist in that circumstance, as well." He shared a wicked grin with Halfrek. "Shall we hire some assassins and put that to the test?" Giving a stereotypical evil laugh, D'Hoffryn offered his arm to Halfrek to lead her away from the group, leaving a stunned silence in their wake.

"I...I don't..." William stammered.

Spike unexpectedly draped an arm across William's shoulders. "Come on, Willy. We both just had a bit of a shock. I'll take ya home and we can hash it out and try to get some rest."

William nodded numbly and started to turn toward the exit.

Buffy rushed forward. "I'll come with you guys."

Spike looked at her kindly. "If it's all the same to you, pet, I think this better be between William and me, just to calm down and digest everything. Stay here with your friends, party with kid sis. You deserve a break. Tomorrow, you can sit with us to try and find a way to help William back to his time."

Buffy knocked the idea around in her head. She didn't want to leave them alone after such a big bombshell, but she could respect that they might need some space. And Spike was making sure she felt included by asking her to help the following morning. Reluctantly, she nodded.

"Ok, I'll see you both tomorrow." Before she could change her mind, she rushed forward to give them both a kiss on the cheek. William looked dazed as he touched his cheek where she had kissed him. 

Spike chuckled at the look on William’s face before giving him a nudge. "Alright, Willy, let's get home and decompress a bit, yeah?" William nodded dumbly and started to head out. Spike gave Buffy one last wink before heading out.

*********

Buffy was sitting by herself, mind spinning. She smiled slightly at the dancing couples.One of Xander's aunts was dancing with a demon Buffy had been introduced to earlier (Kraven? Kroven?) and Dawn was dancing with a young demon with horns protruding from his forehead. She narrowed her eyes a bit at the teenage demon's wandering hands, but opted to let the kids have their fun so long as it didn't go further than that.

She couldn't stop thinking about Spike and William. She understood that they were off doing the guy thing, but she felt horrible about what was going on. She hadn't realized that Spike had felt so lonely that he would drunkenly wish for acceptance. And poor William, being propelled into a foreign time and place. Even if Spike suddenly felt appreciated and William could go home, William could be as far as a month from when he left. And what if Spike never felt like part of the group? Not only did Buffy's heart break for Spike, but she had to consider what that meant for Spike's continued existence. Would he simply disappear? And did D'Hoffryn mean it when he joked about sending demon assassins after William?

Buffy's exhaustion only increased when Xander and Willow plunked down at her table. 

"Hey, Buff," Xander said. "Haven't seen too much of you tonight." 

"Sorry, Xand. Congratulations! I'm happy for you and Anya, I really am."

"Where's William? And, uh, Spike?" Willow looked around as if expecting Spike to pop out of thin air. "I saw both of them earlier, but now they aren't here."

Buffy sighed. "They went home. We all had a bit of a shock tonight." She exhaustedly shrugged one shoulder. "I'll tell you all about it tomorrow."

"Well, I'll be on my honeymoon, but you can fill me in when I get back." Xander eyed her shrewdly. "So that means you're short a dancing partner." Buffy's eyes flew up to meet his. Xander waved a hand at her. "Please, Buff. We all see how close you've been getting to Captain Peroxide. After meeting William, I can't really be in a snit about it." Buffy raised a surprised eyebrow at him, earning a chuckle from Xander. "At least, that's what Anya says."

Willow reached over and took Buffy's hand. "What he's saying is, we're ok if you want to start a relationship with Spike. I know we haven't been around much, but we can see a difference in you from when William arrived. You smile more now. And given how much time you spend with Spike...well, it's nice to see."

Buffy smiled at her best friend. "Yeah? Did Anya say that, too?"

Willow's blush was almost as bright as her hair. "No, Tara did."

"Oooh, you need to dish on that later! I didn't know you guys were talking again!" Buffy giggled as Willow blushed deeper. She took in both of her best friends. "You’ve both got some wise women by your sides," she joked.

Xander looked over to where Anya was dancing with D'Hoffryn. "We really do," he said softly. Snapping back to attention, he turned back to Buffy. "Alright, Buffster...you spend most of your time with Mr. Undead...are you ready to dance with a real man?" He waggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Buffy laughed, "Mr. Undead?"

Xander just shrugged. "Couldn't think of anything better at the time."

"Alright, let's boogie." She turned to Willow. "You coming?"

Willow opened her mouth to say something but Xander cut across her, "Actually, I think Wil has got a dance partner already." He nodded off to the side. All three of them looked to see Tara nervously approaching the table.

"That's our cue!" Buffy jumped up and grabbed Xander's hand. They hadn't been dancing long before Willow and Tara caught up to them. Buffy felt her smile stretch across her face as she reconnected with her friends for the first time since her resurrection.


	8. A Proper Go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a rather important chapter. What’s funny is that this chapter was impromptu. I never planned for it! But I ended up really loving this little chapter. It’s short, sweet, and moves us along.
> 
> Thanks to kats_meow!

When Buffy came downstairs in the morning, she was pleasantly surprised by the full house. Willow, Tara, Dawn, and William were seated at the dining room table, surrounded by books. Willow was typing away at her trusty laptop. Everyone was in research mode, trying to find a way around a vengeance demon's curse. 

"Hey, everyone!" She waved to get everyone's attention. "How's the research going?"

William looked up at her in surprise, rising from his seat politely. "Ah, hello there, Miss Buffy! We were wondering when you would wake. I was tempted to send for you if you did not come down soon, but Miss Dawn convinced me that that would not be wise."

Dawn shrugged unapologetically. "What can I say? You're a lazy bum, but I love you anyway."

"Lazy?" Buffy looked around the dining and living rooms. Where she had thought that it was darker than usual because it was early morning, she could now see that the shades were drawn against the sun. "What time is it?"

Tara looked up from the book she was cross referencing. "Um, it's actually just about lunch time. You must have been tired."

"What were you doing last night that made you so tired?"growled a voice from the doorway leading to the kitchen. Buffy looked over to catch a smirk dart across Spike's face. 

Rolling her eyes, she sat at the table with everyone else. William finally took his seat once he saw that she was comfortable, and returned to the notes he had been writing. Spike swaggered over to the table and plopped down next to Dawn. Buffy didn't miss the way he nudged Dawn's arm affectionately, or the way Dawn smiled back at him. Seeing the bond between Spike and Dawn warmed her heart and brought a smile to her lips. 

"We have been looking up any reference we could find on vengeance spells and paradoxes, but we haven't found much," Willow said apologetically. "Whenever I type in 'time paradox' I get references to Doctor Who."

Spike snorted. When everyone looked over at him, he shook his head without meeting anyone's eye, mumbling something about “'Tom Baker” and “bloody brilliant scarves.” Tara's face lit up as she caught the obscure nerdy reference. She looked like she might say something, but Dawn beat her to it.

"Geek," she teased. Spike looked affronted until Dawn softened the offense with a laugh. Spike grinned tentatively at her and settled more comfortably into his seat. 

Willow chuckled and closed her laptop. "Well, I don't have a TARDIS, so we will have to find something else. But, I think we've earned a lunch break."

Everyone breathed a sigh of relief and closed their books. Buffy looked over at William, who was still scribbling furiously.

"Did you find something interesting, William?"

William looked up quickly and blushed when he saw everyone watching him. "Oh, no, nothing interesting at all." He started to fold the paper he had been writing on.

Buffy craned her neck to try and take a peek. "So what's that? Can I see?"

"Leave it alone, love." Buffy's head wheeled around to look at Spike. His face looked embarrassed and a little pained. "Trust me, you don't want to see."

Puzzled, Buffy turned to look at William again. His face was beet red as he tucked the paper into a pocket. Buffy opted to spare him further embarrassment and let it go.

Dawn wasn't so merciful. "Oh, come on! I wanna see!"

William's eyes darted to Buffy. "It's not quite finished," he muttered. "But I shall show it to Miss Buffy when it's done."

Tara stood up from where she had been watching silently. "Why don't we pack up so we have space for lunch? Dawn, I see you did a lot of really good translations, we can tackle those after we eat."

Under the flurry of everyone clearing the table, Buffy could hear Spike say, "I always did like Glinda" under his breath. She caught William shooting Tara a grateful smile. Tara's return smile was accepting and kind. Buffy felt an overwhelming affection for everyone in the room. She jumped up and headed to the kitchen.

"I'm gonna make lunch!" she called over her shoulder. Smiling, she busied herself in the kitchen preparing the gourmet meal she had been dying to make for William.

Less than ten minutes later, she carried the food into the dining room. "Ta-da!" she intoned as she set the tray onto the middle of the table.

"How strange," William mused. "This is food?"

Willow laughed and reached for her own serving. "I'm guessing you don't have burritos in Victorian England."

William's eyes lit up. "You remembered!" he exclaimed.

It was Buffy's turn to giggle. "I promised, didn't I? Can't have you come to the twenty-first century without showing you the wonders of the microwave!"

"Extraordinary," William breathed, examining his burrito.

Everyone contentedly dug in. After a bite, Spike stood up and headed to the kitchen. Curious, Buffy followed him. She found him digging through the pantry as if he was on a mission.

"Hey," she said softly, "what's up?"

Spike found what he was looking for and spun around with a triumphant smile. "Can't have burritos without hot sauce, pet."

"Ugh, that's so you," she teased. Walking over, she gave him a chaste kiss. "So, I had a thought."

"I thought I smelled something burning."

"Shut up. No, I was just thinking...maybe now would be a good time to tell everyone."

Spike looked confused. "Tell everyone what?"

Buffy took a deep breath. "Tell everyone about us. About how we have been sleeping together and how...you know...it's starting to get serious."

Spike's lips parted in the tiniest of gasps as his eyes took on that look of awe that always turned Buffy's insides to mush. "And are we? Serious?"

Buffy couldn't help but blush a little under his intense stare. "I think I would like to be. I mean..." She hastened to set the record straight since he was looking like Christmas came early. "I can't use the L-word yet. I don't know if I ever will. But...I definitely have feelings for you, Spike. Maybe it's time to explore that."

There were several moments of silence as Spike just stared at Buffy with a sappy grin on his face. She squirmed a bit until she couldn't take it anymore. 

"What?" she demanded.

Spike's smile dominated his features. "You said 'yet.'" 

Buffy rolled her eyes at him. "That's what you got out of all that?"

Spike gave a small shrug. "Well, yeah. That, and that now I can do this." Wrapping an arm around her waist, he tugged her in for a passionate kiss. Buffy allowed herself to relax into the kiss, moaning into Spike's mouth when she felt his tongue probe hers. Spike's kiss was such bliss, she couldn't imagine ever stopping...

"Did you guys get lost in there?" Dawn's voice drifted in from the dining room.

Buffy pulled away from Spike with a reluctant sigh. 

"Later," she whispered.

"I'm gonna hold you to that," he grunted back.

"As long as that's not the only thing you hold me to," she teased, heading back toward the dining room. She heard Spike let out a frustrated groan behind her before he followed her to join the others. 

Buffy sat down in her seat and cleared her throat so that everyone would pay attention. "I just wanted to say something, real quick. Actually, most of you probably already figured it out, but...well, what I'm trying to say is..." Buffy bit her lip in hesitation.

"You're boinking Spike." Dawn burst out. Everyone looked at her in surprise. Dawn just shrugged and took a massive bite of her burrito. "It was, like, super obvious."

Buffy stared at her sister for a moment before continuing. "Huh. Well, ok. I guess you all kinda had an idea. But, things are a bit different now." She looked at Spike for support.

Spike gave her an encouraging smile. "We're giving it a proper go. Slayer agreed to be my girl."

William gave a small gasp. When Buffy looked over at him, William was staring at his vampire counterpart in wonder. "Bloody hell," he whispered, "I did it. I finally found love." When Buffy raised an eyebrow at him, William hastened to clarify. "Future me, I mean. It's comforting to know that there may be happiness in my future." Buffy reached over and squeezed his arm affectionately.

"I'm glad you're out of the closet, sweetie," Tara smiled at Buffy.

Willow looked at Tara in shock. "You knew?"

Tara shrugged. "It's really not such a big deal. You suspected, didn't you?"

Willow looked sheepish. "Yeah."

"If everyone is done going back and forth about something that's none of their bloody business," Spike interrupted, "maybe we could get back to a quiet lunch?"

"Quite right!" William piped up.

Everyone quickly went back to their burritos, pretending that nothing out of the ordinary had happened. William was watching Spike prepare his burrito with fascination.

"I say, man! What are you doing to your burrito?"

Spike looked up from where he was positively smothering his burrito with the hot sauce. "I'm giving it some flavor." He smiled evilly and held out the bottle. "Wanna try?"

Buffy hurried to intercede. "I don't think that's such a good idea."

William tentatively took the bottle. "Why? I am happy to experiment with cuisine."

Spike looked her straight in the eye. "Yeah, Buffy. Leave him alone. Let him experiment." He curled his tongue behind his teeth and leered at her, relishing the glare she was sending his way.

"Oh lord!" William cried. Buffy broke eye contact with Spike to tend to William, who now had tears running down his cheeks as he frantically fanned his mouth. Buffy pressed his drink into his hand and encouraged him to guzzle it down. She gave him a new burrito without the hot sauce, which he accepted, whimpering slightly.

"Wanker," Spike muttered under his breath.

Buffy rolled her eyes and reached her foot under the table until she felt Spike's boot. Catching his surprised eyes, they shared a smile as they played footsie for the duration of lunchtime.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Side note: I was saving William having a burrito for the last chapter, but I couldn’t wait!


	9. Caretakers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Normal Again” is not my fave episode, so basically rewriting it was a real trip. Thanks to kats_meow for looking it over for me

Buffy was patrolling on her own that night. She and Spike had decided that it would be more efficient to split up to start off, and to meet at Restfield to finish. She suspected that what he really wanted was a quickie at his old crypt, but she wasn't about to argue with that. So far, it had been a quiet night. She had one demon give her an ouchie, but he had managed to run off. She wasn't going to let one demon ruin her night; she had a new vampire boyfriend to go see.

As she walked, she thought about how grateful she was that everyone seemed to be okay with her relationship with Spike. Xander was still on his honeymoon, so she hadn't jumped that hurdle, but it was comforting to know that she had Willow's support, at least. And William seemed like a different man since he learned that Buffy and Spike were trying for a healthy relationship. He could be heard humming around the house or scribbling away in a notepad. He still wouldn't let Buffy see what he was writing, but she was sure she could get the information out of him if she wanted to. He was just such a joy to have around, seemingly assured that he would find love in the future. He was so adorable, she couldn't help but smile when she thought of him.

Speaking of adorable...Spike was just up ahead. Buffy took a moment to admire how he moved through the headstones. He had the grace of a predator and it was sexy as hell. Buffy felt a shiver run through her spine. Right, quick loop around the cemetery and then a little time with her vampire in his crypt. 

"Anything good?" she asked as she approached.

The look he gave her conveyed pure joy and love. "Not as yet, love. Bit of a quiet night. How ‘bout you? Ready to pack it in?"

She shrugged. "I got a small booboo, but I'm alright. Stupid demon got away. I think I'm ready to - " She cut off when a pain lanced through her skull. Closing her eyes against it, she was flooded with images of a hospital room, of a doctor leaning in to look at her eyes, and...was that her mom?

"Buffy? Say something, love!" Spike's panicked voice floated to her as if from a distance. In desperation, she forced her eyes to open with a grunt, focusing on the terrified vampire in front of her. "Are you alright? What the hell happened, Buffy? It was like you were gone for a bit," Spike worried.

"That was a hell of a thing," Buffy muttered to herself. Using Spike's eyes as a focus, she explained what happened as best she could. "It was like...you're right, I was gone. I saw a hospital room, a doctor, and...Mom." Her voice dropped to a whisper as she looked at Spike imploringly. "Spike? Why did I see Mom?"

"I don't know, kitten," Spike pulled her close and rubbed her back reassuringly. "Let's get you home, yeah? Get some ice on the back of your neck. The witches and William will be happy to research while I set you to rights."

**********

As the day wore on, the episodes got worse. Buffy would feel a blinding headache before plummeting into a vision. Every time she was forced into her head, the vision became more convincing. One girl in the entire world had super powers? And fought..vampires? Ridiculous. Plus, both her mom and her dad were there. Who wouldn't choose the world where both parents were alive and wanted her?

Whenever she came back to herself, she was met with Spike's crystal blue eyes. He took his role as caretaker very seriously. He was constantly by her side, plying her with water and giving her back rubs. His attentions grounded her, reminded her that her life wasn't all that bad. It helped her fight the delusions that would periodically flash in her mind, trying to tempt her away.

She was snuggling up to Spike on her bed, allowing him to stroke her hair softly, when there was a tentative knock on the door. "Buffy?" Dawn's frightened voice drifted in, "Are you feeling any better?"

Buffy shook her head. "Not really, Dawnie. Any luck on the research front?"

"Um, yeah," Dawn fiddled nervously with her hands. "We think we found the kind of demon that did this to you, but we need him to make the cure. I was actually sent up here to get Spike."

Spike kissed the top of Buffy's head before answering Dawn. "Let me guess, you're using me for my muscle?"

Dawn giggled. "Well, you are the only one here that stands a chance against that thing."

"Shame, that." Spike looked up at Dawn to get his point across. "I'm not about to leave Buffy."

Hearing that made something in Buffy relax that she didn't know was tense. She allowed herself a small smile and nestled in closer to Spike.

Dawn put a hand on her hip and allowed her teenage attitude to shine through. "Fine, I guess I'll go find the stupid demon. I always said I was badder than you."

"For Chrissake, Dawn, I'm not about to - "

"If I may?" a voice interceded from behind Dawn. William shuffled into view, looking worried. "I wouldn't mind staying with Miss Buffy for the duration of your errand. I am used to caring for others, as you well know."

Spike tilted his head while he studied William, an almost sad look in his eyes. "Yeah, I know," he agreed softly. After a moment of consideration, he huffed a great sigh. "Right, then. What do you think, pet? You good to hang out with Willy here while I go and capture the wee beastie?"

Buffy gave William a small smile before turning back to Spike. "Yeah, that sounds good. Just don't get jealous that he gets some Buffy cuddles."

William's eyes widened at her words but Spike let out a low growl. "He can get some Buffy hand holding. That's about as far as I'll go."

Buffy rolled her eyes and gave William a wink before kissing Spike goodbye. She heard Dawn lead Spike downstairs so that Willow could catch him up, while William hovered awkwardly in the bedroom doorway.

Buffy sighed and patted the bed beside her. "Come sit, William."

William slowly lowered himself to the edge of her bed. "How can I help, Miss Buffy?"

"Well..." Buffy smiled wryly. "Spike gave you permission to hold my hand." William blushed a deep red, making Buffy laugh. "But I'd be happy if you just talked to me, kept my mind off things."

"What shall we discuss, then?"

"I think," Buffy teased, "I would like to hear the poem you've been working on." William gaped at her in shock. "Oh, please, William. It's totally obvious you've been writing something."

"Oh, erm, it's not quite finished. I would quite prefer if - "

"Fine," Buffy huffed and slumped against her pillows. "Forget I even said anything." She couldn’t help but feel desolate and alone. Considering how empathetic William usually was, she was upset that he couldn’t see how badly she needed a distraction.

There was a terse silence in which Buffy carefully avoided eye contact with William. Then his soft voice reached her ears. 

“Her hair and skin, reminiscent of the brightest sunshine;

Her soul, pure as the finest crystal;

I have yearned for her to be mine;

In my haste, I erred in dismissal;

For in making her acquaintance I have found

A worthy and steadfast friend;

I find great comfort in the knowledge

our relationship shall never end.”

Buffy looked at him, eyes shining. "That was beautiful!"

William shifted uncomfortably. "It's just scribbles."

"No, William, it was really great." She reached out to touch his hand. "Anything you create and put so much work and emotion into is beautiful. Thank you for sharing it with me."

William blushed but looked pleased with himself. After a moment, he straightened up and said, "Well, that's enough of my compositions. Perhaps I can share some verse from a few of my more esteemed colleagues?"

Buffy eagerly agreed and they spent the time talking about poetry. Buffy eventually drifted to sleep, plagued by hallucinations. The delusions were slightly different this time around. She was still in the mental ward with her doctor and parents. However, Spike was there this time around, holding her hand and quietly supporting her. She looked into his eyes and saw unconditional love, support for whichever reality she chose to believe in. This great comfort led her to an inescapable truth and she awoke with a gasp.

Her room was dark, making it difficult to see. William had fallen asleep in a chair that he had brought in while they were talking. Buffy couldn't hold in her epiphany any more, she had to tell someone.

"Spike!" she called out. "Spike, please!"

William jolted awake. "Are you alright, Miss Buffy?"

"Please," she said, tears running down her cheeks. "I need Spike."

William sprinted out the door. His footsteps could be heard thundering down the stairs in his search for his doppleganger. In no time at all, Spike rushed into her room.

"Buffy!" he exclaimed. He ran to her side and seized her hand, eyes scanning her for injury. "What's wrong, pet? Another delusion? Red is working on the antidote, just - "

"Spike," Buffy whispered. "I had a dream."

"Oh, love," Spike leaned forward and gave her a tender kiss on the forehead. "It was just a dream, all the baddies in your gorgeous head are gone now."

She shook her head rapidly. "No, no, it's not that," she insisted. "It's just...you were there. And you loved me no matter what. If I chose to take the antidote and leave the you that was there, you still would have loved me."

Spike swallowed hard. "Of course I would, Buffy. You know that."

Buffy choked out a small sob. "Yeah, but what I didn't know is that I love you, too."

Spike completely froze, eyes showing a cautious hope. "You might want to run that by me again, Slayer."

She smiled through tears, took a deep breath, and said, "I love you, you stupid vampire. I love you so much, I woke up in a blind panic just to tell you. Look, I’m so freaking in love with you, I have happy tears!" Her voice dropped to a whisper. "I love you, Spike."

Spike gave a short, deep laugh and lunged forward to give Buffy a passionate kiss. She couldn't help but smile into the kiss and nearly started giggling when she felt Spike do the same. The kiss was short and sweet, Spike pulling away much sooner than Buffy would have liked.

"Hey!" She pouted. "More kissing, please."

Spike stared at her mouth, eyes dark with a primal hunger. "Look at that lip, gonna - " He visibly shook himself. "Hold that thought, pet. Gotta get you that antidote from downstairs."

Buffy stammered as he started to stand up. "But - "

"Don't worry, love," he assured her. "This conversation isn't even close to finished." His deep voice was full of promise and Buffy couldn't help but shiver in anticipation. Spike swooped in for a quick, hard kiss before rushing off back downstairs to get the antidote.

Buffy snuggled into her blankets and hummed a little to herself. She felt so warm and loved. Smiling to herself, she eagerly awaited her vampire lover's return.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter after this!!

**Author's Note:**

> End of Ch 1! Hope you enjoyed it! I have most of this fic already written, so I hope to begin posting at least weekly, so you’ll get your ending soon!


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